When you're 96 I'll still be your mother.

I am upset. I am really upset. I know it's stupid but there is nothing I can do about it. She's almost 22 for god's sake. Let go already! I can't. I just can't.

I remember my mom saying "when you're 96 I'll still be your mother". She used to say it to me all the time. I can hear her in my mind. I find myself thinking about that statement constantly now. 'When you're 96 I'll still be your mother". Now I know what she was talking about. I never really fully understood what she meant when she said that until right now, this minute.

My mom was much better at letting go than I am. By the time I was 21 (Kerry's age now) she couldn't wait to get rid of me. LOL While this statement is only partially true there was an element of that in our relationship at that time. I am feeling none of that now that I'm the mom instead of the kid. Our extremely close relationship is one of the highlights of my life and I really wish Kerry didn't have to go back to college. I will miss her so much.

Traveling together

I know that I will feel better about this in a few weeks. It always takes me about that long to settle into my life (or lack thereof) when Kerry leaves. I expect this time to be especially hard due to the fact that she was home for so long. Four months is a long time and I've gotten used to having her around. I also know that I will calm down once the phone rings which usually doesn't take long. She usually calls me 3 times a day and I am more than OK with that. It makes me happy. It allows me to sleep at night.

Happiness is.....

And now, there is this stupid tropical storm ruining my life. Tropical Storm Fay has been hanging over the state for days and days. Kerry has put off going back because of the inclement weather. School starts on Monday and she has to get up there but this damn storm won't go away and I'm freaking out over it. It's a 5 hour drive in rain and wind. Yeah, I'm real comfortable with that she said sarcastically.

OK, I really do need to get a grip on myself. Maybe I'll practice yoga once Kerry leaves. I need to get grounded. I have to work today and that will help to get my mind off all this for a while too. I'll be OK once I hear that she has made it safely. After all, when she's 96 I'll still be her mother.

Kerry proving that she is not 96 yet!

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT! 9:24am, Coral Springs, Fl-Kerry has decided to stay here today and leave tomorrow. Mom is very much relieved. !!!

Blame It On The Big Screen

A few weeks back we got our stimulus check in the mail. You know, the check that we are supposed to use to stimulate the economy and not use to pay bills with?

Well, I decided to be a good citizen of the United States and do just that. I finally bought the big screen HDTV that Pat and I have been talking about buying for over a year. We talked and talked but just couldn't seem to go out there and buy it.

I finally remembered that if a large purchase is to be made around here it's up to me to act upon it. Pat does not shop well unless it's for things that are small or golf related. In waiting for support from Pat (and forgetting that it's really up to me) I'd put money away for it and then spent the money on other things. I'd checked the newspapers for months and months waiting for just the right deal to be printed on the pages. It never seemed to present itself. I researched, researched and then researched some more. I just couldn't seem to pull the trigger.

One day a few weeks ago I was surfing the net and ended up on Amazon.com. I clicked on the electronics section and there it was. The 40 inch Samsung that I had been looking for and at a really good price. The thing that really intrigued me was the free delivery. Best Buy, Circuit City and all the other places I was looking were going to charge me $100 to deliver the TV to my home. Amazon was free!!

This is what I've been watching

I must say I was a little apprehensive ordering such a big ticket item online but Kerry really pushed me to do it. She was completely comfortable with Amazon and after reading all of the reviews about the wonderful experiences that other people had buying this HDTV I decided to give it a try. I'm really glad I did.

HD Paul on my Big Screen

First of all, Amazon has a price guarantee that I love. If they lower the price within 30 days of you ordering the product they will honor the lower price. All you have to do is email them. I managed to save $110 in a week just going the website and checking the price every day. I was thrilled with that.

Richard in HD!!!

The delivery service was on time and really professional. They showed up when they were supposed to, they set it up for me in my bedroom (right at the end of my bed so that I can get radiation burns because it is so close) and were out of the house before I was able to tip them. I was very happy with the "white glove service" that Amazon supplied and the TV is fantastic.

Hi Laura!!

If you are wondering where I have been lately, I've been sitting in front of my new HDTV like a zombie, watching, watching, watching. Being a TV addict to begin with, this new TV just feeds the monster (if you get my drift). 40" Paul!! What more could I ask for?

The hottest man on the planet! Shaving, no less. YUM!! (Sorry Pat & Richard)

Well, what did you expect? LOL

The True Test

I'm still doing really well even though the scale had gone back up to 146. I'm still feeling that click that I talked about before but the true test is coming. Kerry is going to Gainesville tonight and won't be back until Sunday night. This is the moment of truth.

I am well aware that I am vulnerable to binges when I am alone. I absolutely must have an alternative plan to saying home and eating this weekend. I know that tomorrow I can go see my Brother Jon. It was his birthday the other day so I should probably go to see him to give him a birthday hug.

Me and my Bro

I am also sure that I will be going out to dinner on Saturday night and healthy choices can be made when we hit our usual Saturday night haunt. It's a place called Tijuana Flats. They offer a black bean burrito that I can get "power light" which means they switch out the sour cream and cheese with low fat versions. This item comes in at 288 calories which is great in my mind. It's the chips that are a problem. I will try to take it easy there. Maybe I'll count them out and only eat 10. Yeah...right. :)

Sunday, I don't know yet but I do know that I must make some plans that don't include food. Maybe shopping? Nah...no fun without Kerry. The casino? Oh, I'd love to. Nah....no money. I need a hobby. LOL

current weight-146

Hey, Hey, I'm On My Way

I'm on my way. Yes I am. I got on the scale today and I saw 145.5! Yeah!! I really wanted to see 145 again and although there is a .5 attached to it I'm still there. I feel as if I am on the right track again. You know, there seems to be something that clicks inside of you when you are on track and I'm feeling that click. If I can stay the course I should be in the 130's in a few weeks. I would really love that. As I've often said 139.5 would be fine. For me, being in the 130's means I'm at my goal weight. It also means that my life is good. It seems that I can judge how my life is going by how much I weigh. Hummm.....

I know that ramping up my exercise is partially responsible for the downward moving scale. I have been going to the track and also doing a lot of yoga which although Richard doesn't consider it toning I sure do. I'm happy to say that I have continued my yoga practice even though Juliana has gone away for the whole summer. This is the first year that I have done this. I have been going to The Yoga Source which is a studio that offers all different kinds of yoga. I found Joy who teaches a wonderful Hatha Yoga class and I have really been enjoying her style of teaching.

Me in wheel pose

I have been posting on the clubhouse boards a lot more lately. I have been posting on the exercise boards and on Laura's thread every day. I always do well when I am consistently posting on Richard's website. It's good to keep in touch with others that are going through the same thing as me and the other Fabs in particular. I've been weighing in and posting it on Laura's thread. I've noticed that this keeps me on track. Bethy started her own thread there too. I hope it helps her. I'm not going to start my own thread. Someone needs to be there to answer everyone. :)

Hugging Richard

My eating has been really good too. I have been eating 3 meals and one or two snacks a day. Kerry being home has been a double edged sword. Having her around stops me from grazing and that has helped but Kerry likes ice cream at night and she loves to eat out and that is not good. I guess I just need to make a commitment to continue on the healthy lifestyle path and as my mentor Richard Simmons (and Nike) says just do it.

The Circle of Friendship

I have been doin' well the last few days. I am taking time for me. I have been going to the track early in the morning and powerwalking 3-4 miles like I used to do. It feels really good to get back to my old exercising ways. I need to keep it up.

Today should be kinda mellow. Kerry will be going to the library to study and Pat will be going to play golf so I am going to take advantage of being alone in the house. With Kerry home there isn't much alone time in the house. Don't get me wrong. I am not complaining. It is just a fact.

When I am alone today I will light my "circle of friendship" candles which I got at Richard's retreat last year. All of the attendees were given three votive candle holders that we had to label with our three favorite blessings. I picked my inner peace, family and friends and my dog Rigby and wrote them on the labels. All three of these things are extremely important to the general happiness of my life.

Richard and The Fab Four at last year's retreat

We all put our candles in the middle of the wood floor at Slimmons and lit them. There were alot of people at the retreat so there were alot of candles. We all sat down with Richard on the floor and talked about our blessings. Richard was wonderful that day. So loving and so caring. You could feel the joy of that moment. The light that radiated from the circle that was made with the candles was beautiful. It really was a special moment.

Sitting on the wood floor at Slimmons

When we (The Fab Four) got back to Laura's condo we decided to write the other Fab names on each of the candles and then light them again before dinner. It was another special moment for us. It meant a lot to me.

The Circle of Friendship

I light these candles when I meditate or practice yoga and try to relive the feelings that I have when I am with my fellow Fabbers. I must get back to LA this year. I need my Fab Four fix. I need to eat Laura's scrambled eggs and go the the Ramon place. I need to sit around the table and talk about anything and everything with Bethy, Vennie and Laura. I need our shopping trips and excursions. I need to feel that "I can do anything" feeling that I have when we are together. I need to feel our circle of friendship in person, up close and personal.

Feeling Fab at Slimmons

Laura, Bethy, Vennie, I miss and love you all!!!!

Why do I do these things?

OK. I have decided to get back on track....again. I stepped on the scale this morning and I am one pound away from a weight I haven't seen in a long time. Yes, I knew it as I was doing it. I know that I shouldn't be eating ice cream every night. I know I shouldn't be eating out all the time. I know I shouldn't be eating black and white cookies but I do these things anyway. Why is that, do you suppose? Why is it that even though I know I shouldn't be I am drinking the coffee with the crappy for you and caloric Hazelnut coffee creamer I do it anyway? Why do I do that? Why?

Why is it that I get up in the morning and the first thought I have is "What excuse can I use so I don't have to go to the track and exercise?" Why is that? Once I get there I actually enjoy my powerwalks. I love the music that I listen to (thanks Paul) and I love being outside in nature. I even enjoy being all smelly and sweaty when I am finished. Why would I not want to go? Why would I look for excuses? I even look for excuses to blow off yoga and you all know how much I love yoga. Why would I even think about not going?

Why would I not want to exercise here every day?

I need to exercise every day and eat more healthy food. I need to do these things so that I can bring down my marginally high blood pressure and cholesterol. I need to do these things so that I can fit into my clothes. I need to do these things so that I can be alive to see Kerry graduate medical school and become a doctor. I need to do these things so that I can enjoy my retirement years with Pat. I need to do these things so I can be here for my family and friends when and if they need me. I need to do these things to be happy.

One of my main reasons for stayng on track

So here I go again. Wish me luck.

There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me

Have you ever seen that commercial? It's the one with the golden retreiver puppy singing that song that goes...There ain't no bugs on me, there ain't no bugs on me. There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me. Well, guess what? We found bugs on Rigby and not the usual fleas. We found a tick on him. Kerry found a bump on his skin and started to freak because that's how Mac's Histiocytic Sarcoma started so she decided to play doctor. She grabbed a pair of tweezers and started digging around on him. She found something suspicious and grabbed it with the tweezers. She pulled a tick out of him and it started to crawl up the tweezers. OMG!! Rigby was infected!

How cute is Rigby?

I grabbed him and we ran to see Dr Eich, Rigby's vet. Luckily I had just gotten him groomed the day before so he could be examined with little difficulty. It was time for his yearly shots so we had that done to him along with a stick up the butt for heartworm and Lyme's disease tests. I am happy to report that other than a yeast infection in his ear, all of the tests came out negative and Rigby is as healthy as a little horse. Dr Eich thinks that it was a rouge tick that Rigby probably picked up at the pooping grounds which is what I call the place that we take him for his daily walks. We were given a tick collar that he has to wear for three months but it doesn't seem to bother him too much and all is well in his little doggy world.

There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me!

Lucky Me!!

There is a thread on Richard's clubhouse boards that has me feeling very, very lucky. Sometimes I forget that many other people did not have the wonderful childhood that I had. I was surrounded by parents and a brother who loved and adored me in a 50's Beaver Cleaver kind of way. That's sort of how I remember being young in Long Beach. Father Knows Best complete with a dog.

Me at my old Long Beach house that has been recently redone

We didn't have a lot of money but I never remember wanting for anything that wasn't provided for me. I got the Betsy Wetsy (with hair) that I cried about, I got a piano and lessons that I wanted, I even got the Beatles at Shea Stadium Field level box seat tickets which I was sure I would die without. Yeah, I was a happy and a lucky kid.

The amazingly cool house across the street from my house

Don't get me wrong. Things weren't perfect. I was fat. I remember that...really well. I was picked last during games and competitions. I was called names and made fun of but somehow, some way I was able to get through all that with my self esteem intact.

I met Pat, who turned out to be the love of my life, when I was seventeen. Seventeen!!! So many women have lived their whole lives and never had a good, close, caring relationship with a man. How lucky was I to have met my "the one" when I was 17? It's hard to wrap my mind around it.

I can truly say that I have been very happy my entire lives with the exception of a couple of times when life events like death came and bit me in the butt. There wasn't much I could do about that other than carry on with my life and try to be happy.

I have had so many blessing that I can't even name them all. I guess the name of this blog is exactly how I am feeling right now. Lucky me!

Hurt shoulders and burned hands

I had a really strange dream on Saturday night. I was in the middle of a riot. Why were the people rioting you might ask? They were rioting because Tiger Woods had decided to quit playing golf forever. Now I can understand rioting about that. After all what fun is golf without Tiger prowling around the course being all winning and hot? It's enough to make anyone riot. The problem came when the rioting people stole Kerry's car. This really upset me in my dream. I started to make noise and move around in my sleep. I woke Pat out of a dead sleep. He tried to wake me but I was completely into this dream and couldn't seem to come out of it.

The Tiger Woods Fist Pump

I sleep on my side/stomach with my arm underneath my head. I remember waking up but hearing a really strange noise coming from my left shoulder as I was coming to consciousness. Now I can't seem to move it much. Not a good thing. I was injured in the Tiger Woods riots.

Yesterday I was cooking chicken Parmesan for Pat and when I was reaching into the oven my hand touched one of the oven racks. I hit the ceiling. I spent the whole night with ice on my hand. My right hand.

So what does this mean? First of all, I hope my dream doesn't come true. I would miss Tiger Woods and I might have to riot. Second, I have a bum left shoulder and a burned right hand. At least I'm balanced being hurt on both right and left sides. Work should be lots of fun tonight.

Time is getting short

Here it is Saturday morning and I am sipping coffee waiting for the the kid to wake up. I was told yesterday that we would be hitting the mall today. I guess it's a stress reducer for her. It's a pocket emptier for me. LOL

We will go to the Towne Center Mall and shop in all of Kerry's favorite stores. We will go to Anthropology, Nordstrum, Saks, Coach, Abercrombie and Fitch and Bloomingdales. We will check the sale racks in all of these stores and she will drive me crazy until we buy something for her. It's kind of a reward for all this studying. Kerry always does well on the reward system.

We will also have lunch at Salad Creations where we will make our own salads with whatever "throw ins" we want. We will also choose our dressing from a list of about 20 different dressings. I will choose full fat ranch. Yep, you heard me. Full fat ranch. My good friend and fellow Fab L has taught me that sometimes a smaller portion of "the real stuff" is a good thing. This lunch always gives us energy to finish shopping and we need energy as shopping is usually a 4 to 5 hour thing.

This kid is really working hard. She is studying 6 or so hours every day. I know that she will do very well if she doesn't let the stress get to her. She feels as if her life is coming to a screeching crescendo which will be this test. Gen Chem, Organic Chemistry, Physics and Verbal skills. That's what life is all about around here.

Kerry in scrubs...Dr Peewee

Good luck Peewee. I'm pulling for you.

Happy Paul McCartney's Birthday

Today is my Pauly's birthday. Yeah that's what we call him...us fans. We call him Pauly. Well, today is Pauly's 66th birthday. It is a day for celebration and music. I have a busy day today but I will make time between yoga class and the closing to stop listen to Pauly and be happy that I was born at the same time as him. Well, 9 years, 7 months and 11 days after him.

Paul from the White Album

I have so many wonderful memories of Pauly. I remember Shea Stadium in the 60's and flying to NY to see him open at Madison Square Garden in 1989 but my favorite would have to be the last time I saw him which was in 2005. My friend Michele got her husband to fly us up to Tampa. I had really great seats at this concert and I was able to sneak my way up to the third row. I stood there and cried. It was amazing to be so close to my Paul. The security guy kept tapping me on the shoulder and making me go back. After about 10 times Michele stepped in front of him and said "Do you know what dream smasher is? Just leave her alone. She's not hurting anyone". Well, the security guy felt bad for me, listened to Michele and left me alone. There I was. 3 row away. I saw him and he saw me...OMG!! There are no words.

Happy Paul McCartney's birthday to everyone.

Monday, Monday

It's Monday today. Back to work and back on track. I am down 5 of the 15 pounds that I had gained and I'm feeling good. I've been good with food and consistent with exercise. I went to the track this weekend as well and a Friday yoga class and a Saturday yoga workshop.

Making healthy food choices will be my challenge today as I have already been to the track and powerwalked 4 hot and sweaty miles. I will be moving tonight at Curves. It's all about the food today. It's all about the food every day. Oh yeah.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank my blogging friends, Laura, Beth, Vennie and Ang. Your blogs give me motivation, make me laugh, and let me know that I am not alone.

Happy Birthday to you yesterday Bethy. I hope you had a great day. Laura, Vennie and Ang I love you all.

Another one of my guys...Jimmy Connors

When I was 17 and I started dating Pat one of the things that he was into that I wasn't was watching professional tennis on TV. In those days it was all about the best Australian player to ever live, Rod Laver. Pat taught me all the rules of tennis while we watched Laver beat everyone he played. I had never played tennis no less watched it on TV however I was quickly hooked.

Through the years I always tuned into the tennis majors which are the Australian Open, French Open, Wimbledon and the US Open. I was a huge Jimmy Connors fan and never missed him play. I loved his bad boy attitude and Beatles haircut and when he made his last run at the US Open in 1991 I was in front of the TV with my drink in my hand ready to watch Jimmy kick butt.

James Scott Connors

I had just gotten into bed and was waiting for the match to start when the phone rang. It was my very pregnant best friend Michele. She told me that she thought something was wrong because her water had broken. Michele's husband was out of town and I was in charge of making sure all was well with the world so I had to get out of bed and drive her all the way to Miami. Sure enough, she was in labor and had to have a C-section. I sat in the OR holding her hand as the doctors cut her open and pulled her new son Michael from her body. It was an amazing experience but I couldn't help but wonder what had happened at the tennis match.

When I got home the next morning I found out that Jimmy had lost the match and it had been a bit of a blow out. It was the last time that Jimmy played with any real chance of winning against the best players in the world so I guess the 1991 US Open was his swan song.

Jimmy ended up marrying Patti McGuire who was the 1977 playmate of the year. Yeah, a playmate of the year. Oy vey. They are still married and I saw a picture of them recently. It looked to me that the years have been kinder to Jimmy than they have been to Patti but we are all getting old, aren't we?

I still think about the tennis match that got away from both Jimmy and me . To this day I remind Michael that he ruined my last chance to see Jimmy Connors play competitive tennis. I guess seeing a baby born via C-section was pretty cool but OMG! Jimmy Connors was my tennis Paul McCartney and it took me some time to get over missing that tennis match. Michele was lucky that it was Jimmy Connors and not Paul. I might have told her to call someone else that night. LOL

I love Jim Cramer

I watch a lot of TV. I love to tune into the business channel and watch the company stock symbols go by to see if a stock is up or down. I think I like it because there is a gambling aspect to the stock market and as we all know I love to gamble. Is FPL up or down? What about Apple? Are bonds up or down today? Oh yeah, I love all of this.

I make sure to watch my stock market mentor Jim Cramer whenever I can. He is a screaming, totally over the top, prop throwing 62 year old loud guy that has taught me more about the stock market than anyone else on the earth. His frantic style on his CNBC show Mad Money has made me stop and listen to this crazy guy. Before I knew it I was learning things about the markets, oil prices, bonds and keeping up with different stocks. I am much more informed about money now that I have Cramer to teach me about these things.

This is Jim Cramer

When I started watching Cramer's Mad Money (please remember that my maiden name is Kramer) one of the first things I did was buy a Jim Cramer bobblehead doll. Yeah, well, believe it or not I packed up my Cramer bobblehead and took him to Las Vegas with Kerry and I last December. I took pictures of him all during our trip. Cramer at the Grand Canyon. Cramer at Hoover Dam. Cramer in the snow. He actually made our trip more fun because we were always laughing about my Cramer bobblehead however I was sure to check the stock market as soon as we got to our room at the Mirage Hotel. It was the first thing that I did.

Cramer at Hoover Dam

Cramer in the Snow

Cramer at the Grand Canyon

Just to prove I'm for real, here is Cramer and me at Hoover Dam

I have read all three of Jim's books and my favorite is his newest one called Stay Mad For Life. It's written for people like me who are coming up on retirement. He offers some really great advice in this book about 401Ks, mutual funds, stocks and savings plans.

I wish I would have known about him when Kerry was young. She might have been rich now or at least have her college paid for. I make Kerry watch Cramer when she is around. She says she has no interest in the stock market but she does look at certain things like how Apple stock is doing so at least she is thinking about it. Many of her friends who are beginning investors also watch Jim Cramer's Mad Money. He actually goes to colleges to talk to the young kids about investing. They listen to him because he is so loud and out there. He speaks, they listen.

I have heard people say that there is no time like the present so I have recently taken some of Jim's advice put it into action. We will have to wait and see how it all pans out. That is, after all, what the stock market is all about.

What should I do today?

Work, work, work. It seems that's all I have been doing lately. I have been working doubles now for two weeks and I'm ready to collapse. I haven't been able to get to the track in the mornings because I have been working. I haven't been able to get to yoga because I have been working. I haven't even been able to see much of Pat because I have been working. Oy Vey!

I finally have a day off today. Yay! OK, now, do I go to the casino or do I go to Juliana's 3 hour workshop? Well, after thinking about it I have decided on the workshop. It's been over 2 weeks since I last practiced yoga and I definitely need it. I also committed to this class a long time ago and it wouldn't seem right to blow it off to do something as shallow as spending my hard earned salary in a money sucking casino. Oh, alright, yeah, I'm shallow. If I hadn't already paid for the workshop I would hit the Isle casino in Pompano Beach.


Looking at the above picture makes me think screw the workshop, go to the casino. LOL! I am going to be strong today and keep my word to Juliana and the cosmic world. I'm sure I'll be happy that I stuck to my yoga guns today.

I also have tomorrow off but if Kerry has her way we will spend the day digging through the sale racks at the Town Center Mall again. This kid never gets tired of shopping. It's too bad there isn't a shopping section on the MCAT or she can't chose shopping as her specialty in med school. We'd all be rich. :)

Actually, thinking about all of this, I got a promotional mailing offering me $10 free slot machine play on Tuesday and I may actually have the morning shift off. Hummm...wait...is the offer at the Isle or is it for the Seminole Casino in Coconut Creek?



I get entirely too many gambling mailings. I guess the word is out about me.

My wonderful ladies

I have been working a lot lately. Michele, the club manager and holder of most of the available hours left to get married. She will be back in three weeks. Her last day was Monday. I work on Monday nights with her but Michele left early to get ready to fly to St John's and marry her long time boyfriend. I am happy for her but I must say that working this many hours is hard on me physically and I still have two more weeks until Michele comes back and reclaims her hours. Actually, although I am VERY tired I am finding it rewarding on many levels.

My ladies are really wonderful people who are struggling with excess weight and trying to stay healthy. Many of them are teachers at the local schools and are highly intelligent. I mean, lets face it, high school math teachers are brilliant. There is always spirited conversation at my Curves. I make sure of it. It's my job to keep things rolling along and make sure the ladies are having fun.

The other day I was doing a double day which is when I work both morning and afternoon/evening shits. I have been doing quite a few of these lately but usually I am the afternoon/evening worker. The morning ladies are completely different people from the afternoon ladies. It's just a different crowd in the morning. It is mostly older retired people with a few early morning, before work exercisers. So anyway, as I was saying, I opened the club the other day at 7:00 am and there was a lady waiting for me to open. I opened up and let her in.

When she logged in the computer told me her name was Suzette. She was not anyone I recognized but I started to talk to her as I would any of our Curves clients. It didn't take me long to find out that this lady is a Pre-Med advisor at one of this area's premier med schools. In other words, she is the person that helps the college kids get their applications together to get into med schools. I told her about Kerry and her desire to get into a medical school, any medical school.

This wonderful lady is going to meet with my daughter, go over her resume and tell her how to get into med school. She is even willing to give the kid a letter of recommendation based on her favorable feelings toward me. This is an unbelievable stroke of luck for us. Kerry needs help putting her application together and here we have a professional person willing to help her do that. I feel very lucky to have met this wonderful woman.

Lori helped me with my homowner's insurance. When the insurance company raised my homeowner's insurance $1400 per year she advised me to get a specific inspection that saved me over half of the proposed increase. This same lady gave me wonderful advice about refinancing my house which is happening now. She has saved me so much money.

Carol works at our local Dillards. She is always the one who tells me about the 75% off sales on shoes and clothes. She is a New Yorker like me and we kibitz a lot. It's fun. I like her very much. She is a little piece of home.

Angela is a travel agent. She is helping me get Kerry a ticket to go to Cincinnati after her MCATs for a good price. Angela is a gorgeous, fun loving, partying, lovely lady with a big heart, She even brought her dog, Kona, to meet me after hearing so much about Rigby.

Gloria, dare I say it, met Paul. Yep, my Paul. Paul McCartney. She worked for Island Records in the 60's and 70's. She also turned down Mick Jagger for a date because he called her too late and she was sleeping. She met Cat Stevens, Elton John, Stevie Windwood and Ian Anderson among other huge stars. I always love to hear her stories. She lived my dream life. Actually, she was one of my most quiet ladies to start with. It was a challenge bringing her out but I was able to get her to start talking. OMG, was I glad?

These are just a few of the ladies that I have met at my Curves. Yeah, I work my ass off and don't make much money but boy, oh, boy, what fantastic benefits.

The more I work the more wonderful people I meet. I remember when I started this job I said to Juliana, my yoga teacher that I was upset because I wasn't making much money. She told me to be mindful and maybe there would be other benefits to this job. Once again, Juliana was right.

How Was Your Mother's Day?

Did everybody have a great Mother's Day? I did. Pat gave me a dozen roses and $100 and told me to take the kid and go to the casino which he knows it is my very favorite place. What a guy. I did just what he said. I played for about 3 hours and lost $60. It was really fun. Kerry didn't gamble. She sat around studying physics! In a casino! She amazes me.

The slot machines went cold so we decided to take the other $40 and go to the mall. We had lunch at a make your own salad place. It was really good and healthy too. We walked around the mall for a while and then came home and watched some Grey's Anatomy. Kerry bought me those for my birthday. We love Grey's around here.

After dinner Kerry said that she had to go out so I figured she was doing something related to a possible Mother's Day present because at this point she hadn't given me anything. She came in a little later with a smug look on her face and a bag. She handed me the bag and I opened it up. It was a beautiful photo album filled with all of the pictures of our trip to Las Vegas. She even had saved the tickets from the LOVE show and the Titanic exhibit and included them in the album. I was so thrilled. It was really a wonderful and thoughtful gift.

The last part of my present which really wasn't a present for me but I'm looking at it as such is that Kerry decided to move the MCAT back from May 31 to July 8. That means she will be home much longer that we had originally planned. What more could I ask for? I'm ecstatic that she will be home for an extra month. What a great Mother's Day.

I did, however, miss my mom who I wrote about yesterday. She was on my mind all day but I guess that's to be expected. I wish she was here now to help me with all of the issues of getting older. She helped me so much while I was young. I sure could use her sage advice now and going forward (as they say on CNBC). I guess I'll have to figure it all out myself. As my wonderful friend and fellow Fab Laura would say "Oy Vey".

Happy Mother's Day

Today is Mother's Day which is both a good day and a not so good day for me. It's a good day because I get to spend it with my beautiful, funny, unbelievabley smart, tree hugging daughter. Kerry told time that her and Rigby have something planned but I don't know what it is. I'm sure it will involve shopping. :) Today is a not so good day because it is Mother's Day and I don't get to spend it with my mom. She has been gone for 11 1/2 years now and I still miss her all the time.

I would like to tell all of you about my mom. Her name was Beverly Ruth Erma Greenberg Kramer and she born in Manhatten in the 20's. She had so many names because she was a sickly child and she came close to death many times. My grandmother finally brought in a rabbi to say a prayer for her and he added the Erma to her name. She was able to fight back from those illnesses and that fight and determination became a part of her personality. She was a fighter and if she taught me anything it is to fight and fight hard for what you want.

She loved me more than anything. She always was open and honest with me even when times where hard. She stood up for me and always treated me with love and respect. She was ALWAYS there for me no matter what and believe me, I put her to the test a couple of times. Watching her taught me how to be a great mom to my daughter, Kerry and to top the whole thing off, she was a total babe. She was my loving parent, advocate, mentor, cheerleader, critic, teacher but most of all my very best friend. I miss her every day of my life. Happy Mother's Day, Ma. Yeah, I know, don't call you Ma".

I have posted what I consider to be one of the most interesting Kramer family photos. As you can see it is a picture of my parents on a plane with OJ Simpson. This picture was taken in 1975 when OJ was one of my dad's heros and before he became, well you know, OJ Simpson.

It's Great To Be Back

I am feeling much better about myself. Over the last few days I have been consistent with my exercise. I have been getting out of the house very early and that seems to be one of the keys to actually getting it done. On weekdays I get up with Pat at 5:30am. I have a cup of coffee with him and give him his goodbye hug, kiss and obligatory "wear your seatbelt both ways". Then I take Rigby aka The Criminal out for his early morning walk over to the pooping grounds. As soon as I get back in the house I MUST get dressed in my workout clothes, get my water and ipod together and get the hell out of there. If I sit down for another cup of coffee or boot up the computer I am dead meat. I won't go. I've also noticed that I actually fight with myself with an inner dialog of "OK, get up and go", "nah, I don't feel like it", "you've gotta go", "It looks like rain so I won't go". I go back and forth with myself from the moment I wake up until I actually find myself at the track walking. That's exactly what happened to me this morning. It happens every morning. Lately Good Claudia has been winning that fight.

Pat and I out for dinner

Rigby aka The Criminal

My eating habits have also been much better lately. I am sure most of that is due to the fact that The Kid came home on last Friday night. I always eat better when she is around. I'm not sure why that is and I must figure it out. I think it is partially due to the fact that I am not alone much any more. I have noticed being alone always causes food indiscretions. Is it boredom? Maybe. Is it loneliness? Maybe. I have also noticed that I am more willing to cook when Kerry is home. I actually make lunch instead of grazing from noon to dinner. I am sure this is part of my new found will power.

Kerry and Mac

Another decision that I made to help me get back on track was to start posting on the Richard Simmons boards again. I have been missing in action for a couple of months now. Actually, now that I say that I realize that I stopped posting right around the time that I started working. The ladies at work are very different from my Richard Simmons clubhouse friends. The ladies that I work with at Curves look to me for motivation. I go to my clubhouse friends for motivation. Its a different thing. I felt better after my first post on the boards. There is an accountability there that is not there at work and what a wonderful welcome back I received. I had no idea how much I was missed. Everyone was so happy to have me back and the PM's (private messages) were really wonderful. It is great to be back.

In LA with my mentor Richard Simmons

OK, so I've had some interesting revelations about myself and my behavior. I realize that I am really just a work in progress and I am progressing here and there. Now keeping it up......

The Kid Is Coming Home

Kerry is coming home from UF tomorrow and I am psyched. She will be here for a whole month before she goes off to do her internship with the Oncology Dept at the University of Cincinnati Medical School. It has been months since she has been home and I am more than looking forward to it. I miss my other half when she is away which these days is most of the time. She has already told me that we will be shopping. LOL

Kerry and I bonding....in Las Vegas

We will also be spending a lot of time studying for the MCAT. This is an 8 hour class that Kerry will be taking on May 31. MCAT stands for Medical College Admission Test and is the test that must be taken and aced in order to get into medical school which is Kerry's dream. If you do really well you will have your choice of which medical schools you want to go to. If you don't do well you don't get into any medical school. It seems like everything is going to hinge on this test. Enough pressure here?

She has already taken a Kaplan course that taught her how to study for this monumental test however Kerry and I have our own way of studying. At least we did when she was in high school. It was always my job to find something to help her remember different facts. Usually it was something that I found funny about the way the word sounded or something in the definition that struck my funny bone. We always did a lot of laughing during these study sessions and she usually did well on her tests. We will be using the same study plan. Laughing goes a long way. It helps reduce some of the stress and it also gives her a way of remembering things.

I am looking forward to helping her study. I am also looking forward to our marathon shopping sessions which also helps reduce stress....well, it helps reduce stress for Kerry. It definitely stresses my pocketbook but then again it's always worth the money that I spend on her. It's the way we bond and you can't put a price on bonding with your only daughter.

The happy couple at the Grand Canyon

Vinyasa Yoga workshop

Yesterday Juliana taught a three hour Vinyasa Yoga workshop at The Yoga Source. Vinyasa Yoga is a form of "flow" yoga where you are in almost constant motion. Each asana flows into the next one. It is definitely a challenging form of yoga not to be done by beginners.

I have been practicing for 10 years so when I asked Juliana if I was ready for this class she said "absolutely". I met up with my yoga friend Ruthie before class started and at 12:30 we were sitting on our mats waiting for the class to begin. I was a little apprehensive knowing that this was going to be a very difficult class.

We started with breath of fire and pranayama which are forms of controlled breathing. It helps to warm you up and also quiet the mind. Once we were all warmed up the "flow" started. We flowed for about two and a half hours doing sun salutations, down dogs, cobras, planks, pigeons, wheels, backbends and all the other poses that were required. I was glad I had brought my towel. I was so sweaty that my hands were slipping all over my mat. It was a hard workout.

Triangle pose

Wheel pose

Downward Facing Dog

We were in the last half hour of the three hour class when we started doing inverted postures. I find inversions very difficult. I have a hard time relaxing in inverted poses but Juliana puts them in every class. She says they help the whole body including the central nervous system. Usually we do plow pose into shoulder stands. In plow pose you roll on your back and put your feet behind your head with your legs as straight as possible. From there you tuck your shoulders under your body, put your hands on your back for support and kick your legs up so that your are balancing on your shoulders with your feet up in the air. Well, yesterday Juliana wanted to kick it up a notch so we started doing forearm stands which led to head stands which led to hand stands and scorpion pose. It's all very involved but suffice it to say it was hard. Really hard. I have done head stands before but forearm stands, hand stands and scorpion pose were new to my practice. I had seen them done before but always thought that they were beyond my abilities. I guess I was wrong because before I knew it there I was standing on my hands with my feet up against the wall. From there I bend my legs and lowered them into scorpion pose. OMG!!

We ended the class with a nice long meditation and chanting session. I was completely whipped. I told Ruthie that I felt like a quivering ball of sweat but I was a very happy quivering ball of sweat. I did things that I never thought I could do. It sure feels good when you can accomplish something that before you could only dream of doing. I guess my yoga practice is a work in progress. I am progressing and that is a good thing.

We Are The Champions

Whenever I go to the track to walk I always bring my Ipod. I have a thousands of songs on it along with three Beatles movies to help pass the time when I am waiting in a doctor's office or traveling on a airplane. Being the creature of habit that I am I usually listen the the same few playlists which consist of Beatles or solo Paul music. You know, A Hard Day's Night, The White Album, McCartney, Band On the run, Chaos And Creation In The Backyard or Flaming Pie.

When I first got my Ipod Kerry said "You know Mom, you really should put it on shuffle. That way you don't know what song is coming next and you also get to hear stuff that you forgot about." This morning I decided to take her advice. Sometimes the kid is smart.

When I got to the track I put the Ipod setting on shuffle and started on my way. Of course, the first few songs were The Beatles and Paul as most of my music is. I have hours and hours of live performances, outtakes and of course the generally released music. I was happily walking as fast as I could while singing as loud as I could. Yeah, the people who go there are used to this activity.

All of a sudden I heard the three drum noises that start off Queen's We Will Rock You. I haven't listened to Queen in a very long time and We Will Rock You is one of my favorites. It got me walking really fast and as I rounded the track another Queen song started playing. It was We Are The Champions. This song brought back a very special memory for me.

When Kerry was playing soccer she tried out for the under 13 girls travel soccer team. I was all for it considering the fact that I had already turned into a total soccer mom monster. This team was very talented and made it into the regional playoffs. This was a really big accomplishment as they had to play and beat the best teams from all over the state of Florida to get that far. It was a very exciting time for the team and they played really well. Well enough to made it into the finals.

The final game was a squeaker. Our team won by one goal and when the whistle blew to end the game the girls and the parents went wild. After the celebration was over Kerry and I decided to put her stuff in the car so we started walking back to the parking lot. We had to pass by all the players and parents of the team that had just been beaten. They were very sad and many of the kids were crying. Yeah, we felt bad for them but we were on cloud nine. After all, we were the champions.

All of a sudden we heard Freddie Mercury's voice singing We Are The Champions. It was coming from the losing team's boom box. I guess it was an attempt to make the losing kids feel better. Oh wow, did Kerry and I laugh. We kept saying to each other "They're not the champions, we are." As you can imagine, this memory stuck with us and to this day every time either one of us hears this song we think of that wonderful day when Kerry and her team won the Regionals. It was truly one of the best memories of my life. Oh how I miss those heady days of girls soccer but what a fantastic memory that is.

I'm glad that I finally listened to the kid and put my Ipod on shuffle. I wonder what other great memories are on there.......

Back in the saddle again

Lately I have not been going to the track as often as I should. I have used the excuse that I don't have to go because I work at Curves and get a lot of exercise there. While it is true that I work at Curves it is not true that I get that much real aerobic exercise while I am working. Usually, I am standing in the circle and moving but not enough to get my heart rate up and certainly not for the 50-60 minutes that I need to keep my weight under control. I have finally come to the realization that I need to go back to my old exercise habits and go to the track every day or at least 6 days a week. I started back on Wednesday and walked 3-4 miles every day so far.

My favorite place to exercise-"The Track"

I also have to start weight training in my home again. Yep, I stopped doing that too. I always found it easier to stick to my walking regiment than to the weekly weight lifting sessions. I know that yoga definitely helps with toning but it is not a substitute for 3 good, solid, hard, weight training sessions every week and I need to get back to that as well.

So.......I am here to say that I am getting back in the exercise saddle again. I have already started going to the track again and it feels great to be back. My attitude has improved and the scale is already moving in the downward direction albeit very slowly.

My weight training sessions will be starting today. I will be working my shoulders, chest and triceps with free weights while watching the Grey's Anatomy DVDs that the kid bought for me on my birthday. Oh yeah, I am totally addicted to Grey's but that's a subject for another blog. LOL

The cast of Grey's Anatomy

It feels great to be back in the saddle again. I guess I never should have gotten off the horse but we all have to learn our life lessons in our own way. I'll let you know how it goes.