Our Anniversary-Today or Tomorrow?

Ok, well there has been quite a lot of drama around me lately but I am happy to say that I have managed to come out the other side with my most important relationships intact. I am happy and peaceful again. It's how I need to be.

Today is a my 34th anniversary. Yep! I've been married to Pat for 34 years now. To top that off we had been together for 7 years before we got married. If you add it all up we have been together 41 years. Man, that's a long time.

I remember the day I got married. I remember thinking that it was funny that I woke up in the morning and said "See ya at the wedding". There was no-oh, don't see the bride before the wedding. It's bad luck-crap. That's pretty much how our marriage has been. Very laid back and very happy. Of course there have been some tough times but not many looking at the whole picture.

Even after all these years, I never know when we are going to turn off the lights to go to sleep and have something strike us really funny. It happened last night. My sides were hurting laughing over someone's last name on the PGA tour. It was Afabarnrat, which struck us hilarious sounding like half a barn rat. I know it's stupid but it's just the way it was. I was crying from laughter. He makes me very happy.

Pat and happy me

Scotty, Stevie's son, got married today in Chicago. Kerry was supposed to go but she got the first case of the swine flu at Notre Dame. I guess God struck her down with the Swine Flu for being the only Jewish student there. :) I'm glad that I got to speak to Scotty today and wish him well. It's a good luck day.

Kerry and Scotty

I miss Kerry very much today. She was the perfect addition to our family when she came. She ended up growing up with with Pat's and my sense of humor. I have so many wonderful memories of her growing up here, with me. Now, she's all grown up and living her own life at Notre Dame. I'm so proud of her but so sad that she is so far away. How did she grow up so fast? Where did the time go?

My baby Kerry

I was very happy to teach my Saturday yoga class today at Etro Salon. It was a small class with only two people but they seemed very happy when they left. Pat's nephew Johnny and his girlfriend Sherry are in town and we will be having dinner at Pat's favorite restaurant, Tijuana Flats. Not the most romantic day or evening but Pat has to work early tomorrow anyway. I think we will just make believe that our anniversary is really tomorrow. :)

My Happiness Journal

Keeping a happiness journal is a wonderful way to catalog the happiness unfolding all around us so that joy has myriad opportunities to manifest itself in our lives. Writing about the emotions we experience while contemplating joy may give us insight into the factors compelling us to resist it. Namaste♥

This was Juliana's Facebook status a while back and I'm thinking that it's a great idea. When life throws us a curve ball it's good to be able to look back on things that make us happy. I am lucky. I have many.

Kerry got into PhD program at Notre Dame-Now this one is interesting. Just the word Kerry makes me happy. All I have to do is think of her and a smile comes on my face. So many things make me smile about her. Memories of her playing soccer, as a baby in Fuddruckers, "Daaaie, I have to talk to you", clarinet performances, sitting at the table laughing with her and Pat, her high school graduation, spending Thanksgiving with her up at UF and going to Tim Tebow's last home game, taking her to see Paul with the second time a highlight of my life, the Dalia Lama, Coldplay, Hansen (twice)....just so many things make me joyous and happy. I could not have asked for a better experience as a mom. Kerry is the best kid EVER. Now she is going off to the University of Notre Dame. I am so proud of her I could just bust however I'm very nervous about her being so far away. I know she will become a fantastic biological scientist and save the world but I will worry day and night. I can't help it. It's just me but this is about joy and Kerry makes me feel that.

Pat-Another word that brings a smile to my face and is filled with memories. Over 40 years of memories. We were just kids when we got together. I was 17. I am now 58. That's a long time and years of great memories. Things like "no picks", "Flizbata", naked golf, the three of us lying in bed making 3 stooges noises, our trips to Vegas, hump day....just so many things that they are too numerous to write down. He has been a fantastic husband and partner to me. He supports me in everything that I do or say. I can count on him NO MATTER WHAT!! We were so different but we are so together. I guess it just shows you that you can be together for many, many years and still be happy. Pat makes me happy.

Pets-1) Mac. Oh my Mac. I loved him so much and I still do and even though he is gone now I still feel happy when I think of him. I would be sitting on the bed and he would jump up, walk on me, hold me down and lick my face until I screamed. He kept me company after hurricane Wilma hit us and Pat had to leave and go to work, he always made me feel safe because I knew he would rip up anyone who messed with me. He was the love of my doggie life and I suppose I will always chase him ie look for him in other pets. He loved me. He was MY dog.

2) Rigby- My Mac replacement. OK, maybe not so much as he is his own dog with his own personality. He loves me too. I call him my "Pea" which is short for Sweetpea because he is such a sweet dog. He is different from Mac but looks almost the same. He reminds me of Kerry sometimes too. The way he always has to bring around a toy is just like Kerry was when she was a kid. I love him madly but he is PAT'S dog. He loves me but he loves his dad. He's all about his dad. I'm lucky if I can get one little swipe of a tongue when Mac would given me a bath but I love my Pea too. His morning banana dance, his cocked head, the way he watches tv and has his favorite commercials. Very cool pet.

3) Jude-He is a great cat and he is totally in love with me. He comes up and lays on my lap while I am on the computer and messes with the mouse so I can't really write much. He's always under the bed covers when he is cold and we call him the Edward G Robinson of cats because of his meow.He hates it when Kerry comes and brings Elly. He spits and growls and then has it out with the paper towels in the middle of the night. It's funny really. He is orange and looks like Simba. He's a cool guy and I love him.



Then there are my friends old and new. Michele, Ruth, Laura, Beth, Wendi, Sandy just to name a few. I am very lucky to have found these ladies who are from all over the country. They are all great friends and I love them all. I have had great times with them all. I am lucky to have them.

My yoga practice makes me happy and how lucky am I to have found Juliana, my spiritual mentor? She has had the most profound effect on my life making me a more grounded, mindful and nonjudgemental person. Now I am taking yoga teacher training from her and because of her. I owe her so much but she would say that I owe her nothing.

Paul. I have loved Paul McCartney since I was 12 years old. I saw him on February 9, 1964, fell in total love and never came back. He was 21 then. Now he is 67 and I am 58 and I am still totally in love. His music has been the score of my life from A Hard Day's Night all the way to Dance Tonight with over 30 albums of music inbetween. He has been the source of so much love and joy in my life that I couldn't thank him enough even if I could speak with him. I finally was able to see him upclose and personal a couple of weeks ago and I felt exactly the same way that I felt when I first saw him in person at Shea Stadium in 1966. Yep, I'll always love Paul.








So there are some of the things that I put in my happiness journal. As I read over this list I realize that the name of this blog is very true. Lucky Me!!!!

Thanks For The Memories Timmy!!!

Hi Everybody,

I'm in Gainesville waiting for the pre-game hoopla to start. Kerry is on campus finishing up some lab work and when she is finished she will come home, pick us up and off to the game we will go. I can't wait. The atmosphere here is loony. It's like being at a Paul McCartney concert only more so. There should be 100,000 people at the game and we will be sitting with the students in the 10th row of the end zone. We have bought our Gators tatoos to put on our faces before the game so we should fit right in with the drunken students. LOL

Yesterday Kerry and I got up at 5:30am, put on 4 layers of clothes and waited in 36 degree weather for 3 hours to get the correct tickets for the game. They only had 500 upgraded tickets available and I think if we had been 15 minutes later we would not have made it. Kerry has a student ID but Pat and I had to have a certain sticker on our tickets or we couldn't go. It's just another way to make money but totally worth it. We froze our butts off but it was another wonderful time that we will never forget.

Pat has some kind of foot injury. His ankle is all swollen up and black and blue but he doesn't remember thing that might have happened to cause this. It started at home a day or two before we left and has just gotten worse and worse. I hope he makes it through todays festivities alright.

Rigby did really well in the car but all the activity of Kerry's apartment complex is driving him crazy. Every time a car door slams or he hears people talking he starts barking. He is a Lhasa Apso and that's what his breed is all about. He's an alarm dog which normally is a good thing but not so good at 3:00 in the morning. LOL.

Well, that's it from crazy Gainesville. We will all be at the game early to say goodbye to Tim Tebow. It is his last game at The Swamp and I'm sure there will be lots of crying and upset but excitement too. We will be going home tomorrow and back to work for me on Monday.

Goodbye Timmy. Thanks for 4 fantastic years of exciting, winning football. We will miss you. GO GATORS!!!!!

Saturday Afternoon Date

Usually Pat plays golf on both Saturdays and Sundays especially now that summer is here and the rates have gone down but not today. We woke up to rainy skies and some thunder too. The weather station says we will have rain all day today and possibly tomorrow too so we decided to go on a date today. We are going to the movies to see the new Star Trek flick which I hear is really good. Pat and I are trekkies so I'm sure we will both enjoy it. What could be better than Spock on a rainy afternoon? Well, Paul would be better but this is almost as good.

Paul in 1990 in Miami-Yep, I took this picture.

Spock in the 60's-Live Long and Prosper

Geez, I can't even remember the last time I went to the movies. I'm thinking it might have been the last Lord Of The Rings movie and that was a long time ago. Years ago. Movies have become so pricey lately that we are very picky about what we go to see. It's easy to spend a lot of money especially if you hit the candy counter. NOT!!

I will not buy any popcorn or candy at the movies. Not only would that ruin my healthy food plan but it would also put a hole in my pocket. Movies have gotten expensive lately. $9.50 just to get in. I will throw a bottle of water in my pocketbook so I won't spend money on that either.

We are planning to go to the 4:15 show which will put us out right around dinner time. Pat will probably want to go to Tijuana Flats for dinner. I can get a black bean burrito made "power light" which means they change out the full fat cheese and sour cream for fat free and they make it on a wheat tortilla instead of flour. That burrito weighs in at 288 calories which isn't bad. It's the chips and guacamole that's the killer so I just won't order that. Yeah, that's what I'll do.

Sounds like a fun Saturday afternoon date with my honey. Donncha think?

Now It's My Turn

I was working at Curves last Tuesday and I was telling the ladies about Pat and how sick he had gotten. I told them that I took care of him, gave him his medicine, made chicken soup and keep an eye on him. I also said that I was very happy that I had been lucky and not caught whatever it was that he had. One of the ladies, Betsy, said "Well, it's not over yet. You still could be incubating something." Well, guess what? She was right. I was incubating something. Now I am full blown sick. Whaaaaaaaaaa!!!!!!!!!!! Yep, that was me whining!!

I feel like crap and I have to work tonight anyway. One of my co-workers is out of town and Lisa will not care that I am sick. She will tell me to stay behind the desk and tell everyone that I am trying not to get them sick. Lisa doesn't work double shifts and she is working this morning so I am not even going to bother calling in sick. I also have to work tomorrow morning. I just hope I am feeling better then.

On a happier note, Kerry is coming home tomorrow for about 10 days and I can't wait. We are going to the Coldplay concert In West Palm Beach on May 15th and I am really looking forward to that. We will also go window shopping. Note I said window shopping. Money is tight and the days of frivolous spending are gone. I'm sure Kerry will talk me into something. :)

The face I can't say no to. The kid!

I Have A Sick Little Boy On My Hands

Pat came home sick yesterday. He doesn't get sick often but when he does it's usually a doozie. He can be very stubborn and usually won't give into the symptoms of whatever he may have. He also never admits to being sick unless he really feels terrible.

I got home from work last night before Pat got home. He was visiting his mother who came down to her condo in Delray for a little vacation. She has been down for two weeks and is catching her flight back home this morning so last night was Pat's last chance to spend time with her. She's 86 years old now so you never know if the last time you see her will the the LAST time you see her so even though he was sick he went to see her. He was sure to stay away from her and not infect her. No hugs, no kisses, no human contact.

When he came home, I took one look at him and I knew he was sick. I asked him how he was doing and he answered "I feel terrible. I am as sick as a dog". At that moment I knew he was really really sick. I ran to Walgreens and got him some Nyquil. I got him into bed, tucked him in and gave him his medicine. Just like he was a little kid and I was his mommy.

Pat and his mommy :)

We turned on the big screen TV and switched between Tiger Woods (go Tiger!!) on the Golf Channel and Game 6 and a must win game for the Miami Heat (go Heat!!). Pat fell asleep right after half time. I fell asleep hoping he would be feeling better but that did not happen. He woke up feeling horrible and is laying in bed sleeping as we speak.

I am going to go food shopping today to get the nessary ingredients to make my mother's chicken soup. It always made me feel better when I was a sick kid which is how Pat is feeling right now. A little jewish penicillin may be just what he needs. I hope so because it's looking like it's going to be a very long weekend.

So far I am feeling good. If what Pat has is just a regular old form of the flu I should stay well because I got a flu shot this year and Pat didn't. If what Pat has is just a regular cold I'm on a slippery slope. If it's the Swine Flu we are both screwed.

My To Do List

It's getting close. I leave in one week and I am starting to get nervous. It is the usual travel anxiety that I feel once a planned trip gets to be about a week away. I know it's close because Pat mentioned it this morning. He tends to ignore things that he doesn't like until the dying end.

So much to do....so little time.

1. Go bra shopping. This is a must. I can't travel with floppy boobs.

2. Work on my taxes. I want to get it out in the mail to my accountant before I leave.

3. Cook food for Pat. This is something that I do to make life easier for him while I am gone.

4. Go to the podiatrist. I have an appt on the monday before I leave.

5. Go through my closet and see what I have.

6. Wash the things I find in my closet.

7. Take Rigby to the groomer. He's getting long again.

8. Color my hair.

9. Get my eyebrows waxed.

That's my starter list. Now If I can just get at least one or two of these things done every day I'll be ready to go a week from today.

Hang on Fabbies. I a comin.....

High Blood Pressure

It's still dark as I post this blog entry. It won't be light for another half an hour or so yet and I don't go to the track in the dark. Too scary. Once it gets light out there will be people out there to keep me company.

High blood pressure this morning. 145/90. This is the highest it has been since I started taking my blood pressure meds. I don't know why but my pressure is always highest in the morning. I wake up and roll out of bed with the highest blood pressure of the day. You would think that sleeping wouldn't be stressful enough to raise my pressure but it does. I've been on Lisinopryl for about a month now and when I started taking it it worked really well and my pressure was low even in the morning. Little by little it has been rising but only in the morning. I've noticed that my pressure is high after a night of vivid dreams which I had last night. I dreamed about my dad who has been gone almost 25 years and I never dream about him. I'm not sure what that is all about.

I'm going to call my doctor today and ask him if maybe I should be taking the meds at night instead of first thing in the morning. Maybe that will work better. I'm sure my extra weight is not helping my blood pressure. That's always in the back of my mind too but I can't seem to do anything about it yet. As I posted in on our Fucking Agreement blog my food starts out great with healthy choices in the morning and degenerates into junk food and crap as the day goes on. I also need to exercise one or two more times a week. It's what I need to do for my health so why do I have so much trouble doing it?

Kerry's UT infection is back again and that worries the crap out of me. Bob(our doctor) told her to call him as soon as she feel any kind of symptoms and it started again yesterday. It seems that she is allergic to many of the meds that are prescribed for this so that's a problem along with the fact that she seems to be prone to these infections.I will be speaking to Bob about this too as she is in Gainesville and has classes all day.

Pat and Rigby are fine and that's really good. At least one half of the family has no issues.

Busy And Lazy All At The Same Time

Hi Everybody, :)

Yeah, I'm still here. I really don't have any excuses for not posting other than I have been busy and lazy. Ah...now that's interesting. Busy and lazy all at the same time.

Let's see. Busy. OK. Busy with work. Not only have I been working my regular shifts I have also been filling in when needed as well as going around to local businesses and schools to try to spread the word about Curves. You see, there are some health insurance policies that include full payment to come to our facility. We have lots of teachers and Broward County employees that are coming free of charge and we are trying to stir up some interest at these places. We are also trying to make some new contacts around town. Bra stores, tanning salons, nail salons, day spas and any other place that we think the ladies might hang out. New sign ups can sometimes mean more commissions. Note I said sometimes. No, commissions are not paid for the ladies who sign up with insurance. Only non-insurance people are counted for commission payment however we are always trying to increase our membership. The club must make a profit or I won't have a job. Yeah, I 'm busy keeping my job.

I've also been busy with Kerry. She calls me in between classes so she has someone to talk to while she is walking around campus. She calls me 100 times a day. Well, maybe not 100 but many, many times a day. If you count up all the calls we spend hours on the phone every day. She decided to come home last weekend and we had a really wonderful time together. We went shopping! Surprise, surprise. We spent way too much money on a Diane Von Furstenberg Dress that looked so fantastic on Kerry that I just couldn't say no. There's my problem again. Saying no. I don't do it well especially when it comes to the kid. I really don't mind working for a month to pay for Kerry's new dress. LOL. It's all worth it in the end. It's time spent with my only daughter who means everything to me. So, yeah, I'm busy with Kerry.

I'm busy with yoga. I have increased my yoga practice to classes three times a week along with my own private practice which is done a couple of times a week in my living room. I actually have yoga class today and I need to get going. Yeah, I'm busy with yoga.

I'm busy with Pat. We make sure that we spend time together. With him working every day and me working at least three nights a week it can become really easy to come home, say hi, have dinner and go to sleep. We try to make time to pay attention to each other every day. Now, am I the one doing most of the trying? Oh yeah but I don't mind. He's a guy. I get that. I realize that I do most of the "work" in our relationship but we are still very happy and in love even after almost 40 years together. Did I say 40 years? OMG!! Yeah, I'm busy with Pat.

Rigby keeps me busy too. I'm either pulling things out of his mouth, drying off the drool, combing him, feeding him, taking him out, chasing him around or trying to keep him quiet which is a full time job. He's worth the effort though. He is, after all, my son. :)

Now comes the I'm lazy part. On my off days (and if Kerry isn't home) I spend an amazing amount of time sitting in front of my new big screen TV. The Olympics and the US Open tennis match have kept me glued to my TV. Now the college football season has gotten under way. Go Gators! Go Tim Tebow! I gotta tell you, HD is a wonderful thing especially for sports and for Paul too.

I find it really easy to be lazy. I'm not one of those people who have to be doing something. I love being lazy and doing nothing.

So yeah, busy and lazy. That's me. I gotta go. It's time to get ready for yoga. It keeps me busy.

Lucky Me!!

There is a thread on Richard's clubhouse boards that has me feeling very, very lucky. Sometimes I forget that many other people did not have the wonderful childhood that I had. I was surrounded by parents and a brother who loved and adored me in a 50's Beaver Cleaver kind of way. That's sort of how I remember being young in Long Beach. Father Knows Best complete with a dog.

Me at my old Long Beach house that has been recently redone

We didn't have a lot of money but I never remember wanting for anything that wasn't provided for me. I got the Betsy Wetsy (with hair) that I cried about, I got a piano and lessons that I wanted, I even got the Beatles at Shea Stadium Field level box seat tickets which I was sure I would die without. Yeah, I was a happy and a lucky kid.

The amazingly cool house across the street from my house

Don't get me wrong. Things weren't perfect. I was fat. I remember that...really well. I was picked last during games and competitions. I was called names and made fun of but somehow, some way I was able to get through all that with my self esteem intact.

I met Pat, who turned out to be the love of my life, when I was seventeen. Seventeen!!! So many women have lived their whole lives and never had a good, close, caring relationship with a man. How lucky was I to have met my "the one" when I was 17? It's hard to wrap my mind around it.

I can truly say that I have been very happy my entire lives with the exception of a couple of times when life events like death came and bit me in the butt. There wasn't much I could do about that other than carry on with my life and try to be happy.

I have had so many blessing that I can't even name them all. I guess the name of this blog is exactly how I am feeling right now. Lucky me!

A Pep Talk....To Myself

OK Claudia, so today is your last day of being 55. I know that you have been pretty upset lately and thinking to yourself that you don't know why. C'mon, you know why. We both know why. It's because tomorrow is your birthday. I think that being upset about your birthday is something that you learned from Ma. She was always upset on her birthday and maybe that's a way of feeling closer to her now that she is gone. Maybe it's time to really look at things instead of just crawling into a hole as you seem to have been doing over the last few weeks.

Being 56 won't that bad. It could be a lot worse. At least you have things in your life to be happy about. You have a rock solid marriage that has been going strong for over 31 years. Pat lives for you (and golf) and after all this time you still look at him as the only one for you (besides Paul). The two of you are still like a couple of high school kids. It feels good to have someone that you can count on no matter what. Yeah, it feels good.

Kerry is doing really well and how proud of her are you? OMG! She is amazing. She is a loving and caring person and so focused on what she wants out of life. She is working so hard to become a doctor. You know that the world is a better place because she is in it. She is a constant source of happiness and joy for you. She is the best and you are a lucky mom. Yeah, being a lucky mom feels good.


Rigby is there right by your feet. He may not be Mac but he is Rigby and he is your doggy love. So what if he is like a needy boyfriend? You look into his eyes and see his soul. It gives you comfort to know that he needs and loves you. He makes you feel all warm and fuzzy. Yeah, that's a good feeling.

You love your new job at Curves. Even though you will not become Donald Trump at this job it is fun and it feels good to help people reach their goals. The clients all love you and they respond to your upbeat personality. They look forward to coming when you are there. Best of all you get paid to workout. Just like Richard. Yeah, that is good.

Your overall health is good and your weight is steady at 145.5. I know you feel as if you have not been doing very well when it comes to eating and exercising but you are not showing any weight gain. You are going to have to make an effort to get a little more exercise on nonworking days. You also need to start cooking at home more than you have been. Your blood pressure has been a little high lately and I am sure it's because of the salt that is always in restaurant food. You need to make more of an effort to eat more healthy food. Remember what Richard told you oh so long ago. "Cut the crap and just do it". Yeah, that felt good.


You are lucky to have your brother Jon to talk to. He makes you feel as if you are still a Long Beach kid. He always brings you back to Lafayette Blvd and when you talk to him it's almost as if Ma and Irv are still alive. I know you miss Ma but she would want you to continue down the path that you are on and she would be very proud of you. She would be very happy that you and Jon are close and that you have each other to rely on. You have to keep on him about his health. You need him to live a long life with you. Yeah, having an older brother is good.

Cousin Stevie is with you too. Well, where else would he be? Stevie has been by your side from the time you were a little kid. Yeah, he drives you crazy sometimes but he is family and he reminds you that family is what is most important. Yeah, family is good.


You always have Michele too. You call her the sister you never had and the brother that you did. From the first time you met her it was as if you knew her your whole life. You two have gone through everything together including losing our Moms and having kids. You are as close as two peas in a pod. Michele is your Ma replacement. When you need advice from Ma you go to Michele and she always says what Ma would have said. How does she do that? There will always be room in the Winabago for Michele. LOL Yeah, having such a close best friend feels good.

You are part of the Fab Four. How lucky are you to have found these three ladies? They all get you and that is SO unusual. They remind you of what you are capable of and that is a gift in itself. You love them all and they love you too. Yeah, being a member of the Fab Four is good.


So life at 56 won't be so bad. After all, as Ma used to say there is only one alternative.

She's Leaving Home, Bye, Bye

Kerry left this morning to go back to Gainesville and I am bummed. The longer her visit is the more bummed I am when she leaves. Seeing that she was here for almost a month I am very bummed. The trick will be to stay away from the refrigerator now that she is gone. This is always one of my most difficult tasks and it just got even more trying.

The caller ID said "Kerry" when the phone rang. I knew something was wrong from the first word. "Mom'"? "Yeah". "I have a flat tire". These are the words that I dread when she is on the one of these road trips. My mind goes wild. I can't help it. I imagine the most awful things that could happen to her. Thankfully she not alone. She is with her friend Jackie which makes me feel 100% better.

While she was on the phone talking to me a state trooper came along. Yes!!!! He called the Florida Turnpike emergency truck and they are on their way to change the tire for her. Now my mind says what if she has no air in the spare? How will she make it to Gainesville on a donut tire? What if? What if? What if? OK Claudia, stop all that! You are driving yourself crazy. Worry about it when it happens, whatever it is that is going to happen.

This is a facet of my personality that I wish I could change. I am in constant worry mode when either Kerry or Pat are away from me which is most of the time. I drive them both crazy. I know I do but I can't help it. I always think the worst when things are not exactly the way they should be where either one of them is concerned. God help me if they don't answer their phones when I call. I have to talk myself down from the walls. I have to keep telling myself that everything is going to be okay. It's going to be fine. Maybe I should go to a shrink. Nah. As Popeye says, I am what I am. I'll just sit and worry until everything is alright. Maybe all this worrying will keep my head out of the fridge. Maybe.