Thoughts on the upcoming holidays

I've been feeling good lately although I know some stressful times are coming. Thanksgiving is a stressful time for me as it's always at my house. I am so glad that Kerry is coming home for the holiday this year. Last year Pat and I packed up Rigby and went up to Gainesville to spend Thanksgiving up there with Kerry up at UF. We cooked Thanksgiving dinner for the 4 of us (Rigby included) and then went to the UF/FSU game. We had such a great time and it was good to get away from the stress of having Thanksgiving dinner at my house.

Kerry will be arriving on her birthday Wednesday in the morning and then Frank will be coming in later on in the day. They are planning to spend the holiday split between us and Frank's parents who live about an hour away. I don't mind sharing. I'm just happy to have them here. Jon and Cousin Stevie will be coming over for dinner and to meet Frank. It'll be Turkey for the carnivores, Tofurkey for the vegetarians and birthday cake for everyone. :)

Frank and Kerry

Kerry is going to spend Friday with me. We will be going shopping!!!!! Yay!!!!! It's been way too long since we have combed the malls for bargains. I'm sure we will be getting a very early start. There is nothing better in the whole world then Black Friday with the kid. :)

On Saturday we will be going to an engagement party in the morning and then I'm sure she will want to spend time with Frank before he goes back to Gainesville on Sunday. Kerry is flying out on Monday but she will be back in a few weeks to spend some more time with us during her winter break from Notre Dame.

The Grotto at Notre Dame

The three of us at Notre Dame Football Stadium

The golden dome at Notre Dame

I miss her. I can't help it. I just miss her and I'm so looking forward to spending some time with her.

Bathing Suit Shopping....Kill Me Now!!

Now that I have the new gym membership which includes a membership to three of our local pools I realized that I only had one bathing suit. I saw that Macy's was having a killer sale so I decided to go shopping and maybe add another one to my collection of one. NOT!!!! It was a horrible experience. So many different emotions surfaced during this shopping trip and none of them were good.

To begin with I have definitely gained weight. There is no denying it anymore. It's funny how even though the scale keeps going up you can really make yourself believe that it's not. I went into the store thinking that this was not going to be that bad. I was wrong. I've gained weight and there it was staring me in the face in the form of large flabby thighs, hanging skin and a big belly. Every suit I tried on looked terrible. Each one worse than the other. After about 10 of them I decided to screw getting a new suit. The people at the pool will just have to get used to the one that I have which I actually like. I guess I should have bought two when I found it.

After trying on the suits and feeling like crap I noticed the Auntie Anne's pretzel stand. I really wanted a cinnamon sugar pretzel. I mean I really wanted one but I walked by thinking to myself that eating a pretzel would not help in any way other than to make things worse.....but I really wanted one. Then I saw the cupcake stand. Anyone who knows me knows I love cake and cupcakes. They are a weakness of mine. I started walking towards it like a zombie. No thought, no mindfulness, no consequences. I mean after all, I was feeling like crap. I was fat again and one cupcake was not going to make or break the problem and it would make me feel good. As I got closer I reached in my pocket and grabbed my phone. I called my good friend Laura who always knows what to say to me whatever I may be going through. In thinking back on it I guess it was my subconcious that called Laura because all of sudden I found myself talking to her. I don't have any memory of pushing the buttons to call her. I don't even remember the thought process that I must have gone through before I called her. I just know that I did and as always she talked me down from the wall. I left the mall talking to her and not eating a cupcake.

I still feel terrible about the whole thing. I got on the scale this morning and there it was. 156. The scale keeps going up, up, up. I know why though. My eating has been terrible lately and my plantar fasciitis has stopped me from doing any hard exercise. I must say I am feeling really bad about myself. I am up in weight and out of shape. I look like crap in a bathing suit and I'm not doing anything much about it. I have no job and no prospects. Kerry is talking about going even further away than she is right now. I'm really feeling down. I find in writing this down that the fact that Kerry is talking about New Jersey, Michigan and Canada is really, really bothering me. It's the worst of all. I'm sorry, Peewee but it's the truth. I know that you have to go where it's best for your schooling and your career but......the tears are falling as I am writing. I can't help it.

I am going to drag myself into the living room and put on one of Richard's videos. Maybe that will make me feel better. It certainly won't hurt the gaining weight problem. It can only help but my heel pain limits me in what I can do. I don't want to go to the gym today. I just don't feel like it but I know that if I don't go and I don't do any exercise I'll be sorry later just like I was in the dressing room yesterday.

My To Do List

It's getting close. I leave in one week and I am starting to get nervous. It is the usual travel anxiety that I feel once a planned trip gets to be about a week away. I know it's close because Pat mentioned it this morning. He tends to ignore things that he doesn't like until the dying end.

So much to do....so little time.

1. Go bra shopping. This is a must. I can't travel with floppy boobs.

2. Work on my taxes. I want to get it out in the mail to my accountant before I leave.

3. Cook food for Pat. This is something that I do to make life easier for him while I am gone.

4. Go to the podiatrist. I have an appt on the monday before I leave.

5. Go through my closet and see what I have.

6. Wash the things I find in my closet.

7. Take Rigby to the groomer. He's getting long again.

8. Color my hair.

9. Get my eyebrows waxed.

That's my starter list. Now If I can just get at least one or two of these things done every day I'll be ready to go a week from today.

Hang on Fabbies. I a comin.....

Going For A Test Run

I gave my orthodics a test run at the track this morning and it went very well. Dr Tanner told me that he wanted me to start out slow and do one mile the first day. I had been away from the track for so long that I couldn't just stop after one mile so I did two miles. It felt good. No pain...yet. Now I'm off to yoga class and then later I have to work. That will be quite the test. Hopefully I won't be feeling any pain by the end of the night.

On another note, Kerry is coming in from Gainesville tomorrow for a few days. I can't wait to see her. It's been two months since I laid eyes on my girl and that's too long for this Mom. I am giving up free yoga day on Saturday to go shopping. I am so looking forward to shopping and talking and laughing with the kid. It's gonna be great. I'll only have until Wednesday though. She will be taking off to Washington DC for an AMSA convention and then back to Gainesville. I gonna try to take Monday night off so that we can spend that night together and the Kerry can come with me to Curves on Tuesday night. I'm going to be making the most of the time that we have together.

The Last Hurrah

OK. Here we go again. Today is the last day that I get to spend with the kid before she goes skippingly back to UF. This time she is thrilled to be going back because her boyfriend Zac will be there waiting for her. I, on the other hand, will be standing in the driveway crying when she leaves. It's always hard for me when she goes back after a long visit like this winter break has been. She's my bud. My other half. I miss the crap out of her when she is gone.

Kerry sitting on the gator on the UF campus

Today I will wake her up and we will go back to the Town Center Mall in Boca Raton. We will shop the sale racks at Bloomindale's, Nordstrom, Neiman Marcus, Apple, Coach, Henri Bendel, Dana Buchman and Sephora among other stores. I'm actually hoping that these stores are totally shopped out because Kerry doesn't need any more clothes but I just can't say no once we are in the dressing room. It's kind of like I am with food. I just can't say no to either one. Kerry or Food. Hmmm.....

We will walk for hours and when we get hungry we will go to Salad Creations and get what we refer to as "a big salad". I usually get a "chopped veggie" salad with no croûtons and just a little cheese. My dressing of choice will be, gasp, full fat ranch dressing. Yep, full fat. A friend of mine taught me that a little full fat is better than lots of crappy tasting fat free. I plan on keeping The F*ing Agreement in mind while in the mall. No Ben and Jerry's. No gourmet pastries.

We will shop and shop and talk and laugh. Later on in the afternoon we will stop off at the Nordstrom's coffee shop where I will have a small regular coffee with skim milk and Splenda and Kerry will have an iced latte with lots of raw sugar. We will sit there, drink coffee and people watch. We will laugh at some of the rich ladies with their little dogs in strollers and their cosmetic surgery. I'll complain about money and Kerry will tell me how I shouldn't worry because someday she will be a doctor. I'll tell her that I don't want to spend her money and only want to spend my own. We will laugh about that.

Kerry and I having coffee at Nordstrom

We will shop until Pat calls and tells us that he is finished playing golf and is ready to go to Tijuana Flats for dinner. With the F*ing Agreement in mind I will order a small Black Bean Powerlight Burrito which comes in at about 280 calories. Not too bad. The trouble comes with the chips and guacamole on the side. I can give most of the chips to the kid but will I? I'll report in on our new blog called F*ing Agreement or here if I'm not able to get into the blog to post. (Laura and I have been having some technical difficulties).

We will all come home, pile into bed and watch football until Pat and I fall asleep and Kerry goes into her room to call Zac.

Kerry and Zac

It will be a totally glorious time for me spent with my incredible, beautiful, smart, gorgeous daughter who I love so much.

Then I will wake up and it will be tomorrow and Kerry will be leaving. OK, now I absolutely not lose control when she leaves. Remember the agreement...

Ebates Is Cool

As many of you already know I love to shop and I do a lot of online shopping especially this time of year. I came across this website called Ebates and it is cool as hell. So cool in fact that I decided to blog about it here and maybe save you guys some cash which is always a good thing.

If you are an online shopper like I am you will probably love Ebates as much as I do. They have agreements with all of the big online sites like Bluefly, Victoria's Secret, Macy's, Bloomingdales, Nordstrom, Ebay, Borders, QVC, Barnes and Noble , Sephora, Best Buy, and just about anything you can think of. They have hundreds of sites linked to this website. Things like cosmetic sites, shoe sites, fitness sites, golf sites, department store sites. They really have it all. The only thing that they don't have is Amazon.com. That makes me sad because I love Amazon and buy a lot from them but I guess you can't have everything.

The cool part about this website is that if you sign up and then shop at your regular websites they credit money back to your account. Each website gives you a different percentage of money back. So far I've made over $10 shopping the normal places that I would have shopped anyway. Now I realize that $10 isn't that much money but I figure that it's 10 more bucks than I had before. I'm always up for new ways of making money and this really works for me. You can either be paid by a check or a deposit into your paypal account. You are paid every three months. Perfect for holiday shopping.

They run specials and also offer coupons for some websites. I've also noticed that they have the same deals that are offered to me directly from these sites. Take Victoria's Secret for example. They recently sent me an email offering me 20 percent off my next order. When I logged on through ebates I was offered the same 20 percent off. Not only that but I was able to take advantage of a free shipping coupon as well. On top of all of that I got back 4 percent of my order. Not bad.

If you sign up, please mention my name as the referral and I'll get $5 in my account. If you tell people and they sign up with your name as a referral you'll get $5 in your account. Like I said, it's as cool as hell.

Check it out and let me know what you think. The link is www.ebates.com Happy shopping. :)

The True Test

I'm still doing really well even though the scale had gone back up to 146. I'm still feeling that click that I talked about before but the true test is coming. Kerry is going to Gainesville tonight and won't be back until Sunday night. This is the moment of truth.

I am well aware that I am vulnerable to binges when I am alone. I absolutely must have an alternative plan to saying home and eating this weekend. I know that tomorrow I can go see my Brother Jon. It was his birthday the other day so I should probably go to see him to give him a birthday hug.

Me and my Bro

I am also sure that I will be going out to dinner on Saturday night and healthy choices can be made when we hit our usual Saturday night haunt. It's a place called Tijuana Flats. They offer a black bean burrito that I can get "power light" which means they switch out the sour cream and cheese with low fat versions. This item comes in at 288 calories which is great in my mind. It's the chips that are a problem. I will try to take it easy there. Maybe I'll count them out and only eat 10. Yeah...right. :)

Sunday, I don't know yet but I do know that I must make some plans that don't include food. Maybe shopping? Nah...no fun without Kerry. The casino? Oh, I'd love to. Nah....no money. I need a hobby. LOL

current weight-146

Time is getting short

Here it is Saturday morning and I am sipping coffee waiting for the the kid to wake up. I was told yesterday that we would be hitting the mall today. I guess it's a stress reducer for her. It's a pocket emptier for me. LOL

We will go to the Towne Center Mall and shop in all of Kerry's favorite stores. We will go to Anthropology, Nordstrum, Saks, Coach, Abercrombie and Fitch and Bloomingdales. We will check the sale racks in all of these stores and she will drive me crazy until we buy something for her. It's kind of a reward for all this studying. Kerry always does well on the reward system.

We will also have lunch at Salad Creations where we will make our own salads with whatever "throw ins" we want. We will also choose our dressing from a list of about 20 different dressings. I will choose full fat ranch. Yep, you heard me. Full fat ranch. My good friend and fellow Fab L has taught me that sometimes a smaller portion of "the real stuff" is a good thing. This lunch always gives us energy to finish shopping and we need energy as shopping is usually a 4 to 5 hour thing.

This kid is really working hard. She is studying 6 or so hours every day. I know that she will do very well if she doesn't let the stress get to her. She feels as if her life is coming to a screeching crescendo which will be this test. Gen Chem, Organic Chemistry, Physics and Verbal skills. That's what life is all about around here.

Kerry in scrubs...Dr Peewee

Good luck Peewee. I'm pulling for you.

The Kid Is Coming Home

Kerry is coming home from UF tomorrow and I am psyched. She will be here for a whole month before she goes off to do her internship with the Oncology Dept at the University of Cincinnati Medical School. It has been months since she has been home and I am more than looking forward to it. I miss my other half when she is away which these days is most of the time. She has already told me that we will be shopping. LOL

Kerry and I bonding....in Las Vegas

We will also be spending a lot of time studying for the MCAT. This is an 8 hour class that Kerry will be taking on May 31. MCAT stands for Medical College Admission Test and is the test that must be taken and aced in order to get into medical school which is Kerry's dream. If you do really well you will have your choice of which medical schools you want to go to. If you don't do well you don't get into any medical school. It seems like everything is going to hinge on this test. Enough pressure here?

She has already taken a Kaplan course that taught her how to study for this monumental test however Kerry and I have our own way of studying. At least we did when she was in high school. It was always my job to find something to help her remember different facts. Usually it was something that I found funny about the way the word sounded or something in the definition that struck my funny bone. We always did a lot of laughing during these study sessions and she usually did well on her tests. We will be using the same study plan. Laughing goes a long way. It helps reduce some of the stress and it also gives her a way of remembering things.

I am looking forward to helping her study. I am also looking forward to our marathon shopping sessions which also helps reduce stress....well, it helps reduce stress for Kerry. It definitely stresses my pocketbook but then again it's always worth the money that I spend on her. It's the way we bond and you can't put a price on bonding with your only daughter.

The happy couple at the Grand Canyon

Shopping With The Kid

Kerry and I bond as mother and daughter by shopping. This is something that we have done as long as I can remember. We always have a great time and Kerry usually ends up with something new. Our trip to the Town Center Mall yesterday was no exception.

Entering Town Centre Mall

The first store we hit was Abercombie and Fitch. We always shop the sale racks there.

Kerry liked this tank top

She liked this one too!

This one was a NO!

This one was a definite maybe!

We ended up buying 3 tops but got very hungry shopping so we hit the food court. When we go to this mall we always make our own salads at Salad Creations.

This is my salad with low fat ranch and Caribbean mango dressing. Yum!

Kerry eating her greek salad.

When we finished lunch we hit Bloomingdales. It is one of our favorite stores. Great stuff and great sale racks.

Free People is one of Kerry's favorite line of clothes

Off to Juicy Couture !

Then to Tiffany's

And Saks Fifth Avenue. They have a really nice bathroom.

Note the Dr Seigal's Cookie Diet kiosk. You gotta be kidding me. Richard, where are you?

Then it was time to go to American Eagle. Kerry needed jeans but there were more shirts that needed to be tried on!

We both liked this one.

This was my favorite of the day.

We stopped for coffee and took a picture together. We are a happy couple.

It was time to leave and we were shopped out. When we got there the parking lot was full. Now my car was the only one left in the lot. I guess we shopped for a long time.

So that is a typical shopping trip with me and the kid. It's the best time in the world.

Viva Las Vegas Part 1

About 10 months ago Pat said "why don't you take Kerry to Las Vegas for her 21st birthday? I'll stay home and take care of the dog". I'll stay home and take care of the dog?? Well, he didn't have to say that twice. I made the airline reservations that day even though her birthday wasn't for nine months.

We decided to stay at The Mirage hotel. It is centrally located and seeing that I wasn't going to rent a car it was a perfect choice. We had a very nice room overlooking the Las Vegas Strip and we were close to everything.

I was ready to gamble and Kerry was ready to shop. Shop?? You gotta be kidding me. With all those blackjack and craps tables? We decided that would I wake up early each day and get my gambling fix in and then we would do what Kerry wanted for the rest of the day. It sounded like a good plan to me.

I woke up each morning and was at the tables with a large coffee in my hand by 5:30am. When I didn't hear anything from Sleeping Beauty by 10:00 or 11:00 I called her and woke her up. By that time I had 5 or 6 hours of gambling under my belt and I was ready for whatever the kid wanted to do.

One of the days was the designated shopping day. Kerry wanted to break our previous shopping record of 4 malls in one day. We started out in the Forum Shops at Caesar's Palace which was a fantastic 3 story indoor mall with every designer store imaginable.

Then it was off to the Shoppes at the Venetian Hotel. Another fantastic mall with gobs of shops and restaurants. The ceiling was painted like the sky so you felt as if you were walking the streets of Venice. Very cool.

Then it was off the Bellagio Hotel to look around in the designer shops there. This is another very upscale, gorgeous hotel with paintings on the ceilings and wonderful shopping.Then it was time to go to the new Wynn hotel and see what kind of shopping was there. It was more of the same. Prada, Gucci, Chanel, Fendi...you get the idea.

We finished up that night at the Fashion Show mall. I'm sorry to say I don't have any picture of this place. It was the one of the biggest malls I have ever seen and I have been to some big malls like Sawgrass Mills. It was 3 stories filled with every store you could name. Kerry was in hog heaven.

Considering the amount of time that we spent shopping that day we really didn't buy much. We got a few presents to bring back and of course 3 dresses for the kid. I thought that wasn't bad seeing that we were in some of the most expensive stores in the world.

We started shopping at 11:00am and fell into the hotel room that night at 10:00. We were whipped. We were shopped out. So shopped out, in fact, that we ended up ordering room service and going to bed early. It was Belgian Waffles for me and Haevos Rancherous for Kerry. It was her first experience with room service. It was a yummy experience.




Going to bed early turned out to be a good thing. I was up at 5:00am refreshed and ready for another try at a 6 hour blackjack marathon. The house won.

More at a later date.