My Happiness Journal

Keeping a happiness journal is a wonderful way to catalog the happiness unfolding all around us so that joy has myriad opportunities to manifest itself in our lives. Writing about the emotions we experience while contemplating joy may give us insight into the factors compelling us to resist it. Namaste♥

This was Juliana's Facebook status a while back and I'm thinking that it's a great idea. When life throws us a curve ball it's good to be able to look back on things that make us happy. I am lucky. I have many.

Kerry got into PhD program at Notre Dame-Now this one is interesting. Just the word Kerry makes me happy. All I have to do is think of her and a smile comes on my face. So many things make me smile about her. Memories of her playing soccer, as a baby in Fuddruckers, "Daaaie, I have to talk to you", clarinet performances, sitting at the table laughing with her and Pat, her high school graduation, spending Thanksgiving with her up at UF and going to Tim Tebow's last home game, taking her to see Paul with the second time a highlight of my life, the Dalia Lama, Coldplay, Hansen (twice)....just so many things make me joyous and happy. I could not have asked for a better experience as a mom. Kerry is the best kid EVER. Now she is going off to the University of Notre Dame. I am so proud of her I could just bust however I'm very nervous about her being so far away. I know she will become a fantastic biological scientist and save the world but I will worry day and night. I can't help it. It's just me but this is about joy and Kerry makes me feel that.

Pat-Another word that brings a smile to my face and is filled with memories. Over 40 years of memories. We were just kids when we got together. I was 17. I am now 58. That's a long time and years of great memories. Things like "no picks", "Flizbata", naked golf, the three of us lying in bed making 3 stooges noises, our trips to Vegas, hump day....just so many things that they are too numerous to write down. He has been a fantastic husband and partner to me. He supports me in everything that I do or say. I can count on him NO MATTER WHAT!! We were so different but we are so together. I guess it just shows you that you can be together for many, many years and still be happy. Pat makes me happy.

Pets-1) Mac. Oh my Mac. I loved him so much and I still do and even though he is gone now I still feel happy when I think of him. I would be sitting on the bed and he would jump up, walk on me, hold me down and lick my face until I screamed. He kept me company after hurricane Wilma hit us and Pat had to leave and go to work, he always made me feel safe because I knew he would rip up anyone who messed with me. He was the love of my doggie life and I suppose I will always chase him ie look for him in other pets. He loved me. He was MY dog.

2) Rigby- My Mac replacement. OK, maybe not so much as he is his own dog with his own personality. He loves me too. I call him my "Pea" which is short for Sweetpea because he is such a sweet dog. He is different from Mac but looks almost the same. He reminds me of Kerry sometimes too. The way he always has to bring around a toy is just like Kerry was when she was a kid. I love him madly but he is PAT'S dog. He loves me but he loves his dad. He's all about his dad. I'm lucky if I can get one little swipe of a tongue when Mac would given me a bath but I love my Pea too. His morning banana dance, his cocked head, the way he watches tv and has his favorite commercials. Very cool pet.

3) Jude-He is a great cat and he is totally in love with me. He comes up and lays on my lap while I am on the computer and messes with the mouse so I can't really write much. He's always under the bed covers when he is cold and we call him the Edward G Robinson of cats because of his meow.He hates it when Kerry comes and brings Elly. He spits and growls and then has it out with the paper towels in the middle of the night. It's funny really. He is orange and looks like Simba. He's a cool guy and I love him.



Then there are my friends old and new. Michele, Ruth, Laura, Beth, Wendi, Sandy just to name a few. I am very lucky to have found these ladies who are from all over the country. They are all great friends and I love them all. I have had great times with them all. I am lucky to have them.

My yoga practice makes me happy and how lucky am I to have found Juliana, my spiritual mentor? She has had the most profound effect on my life making me a more grounded, mindful and nonjudgemental person. Now I am taking yoga teacher training from her and because of her. I owe her so much but she would say that I owe her nothing.

Paul. I have loved Paul McCartney since I was 12 years old. I saw him on February 9, 1964, fell in total love and never came back. He was 21 then. Now he is 67 and I am 58 and I am still totally in love. His music has been the score of my life from A Hard Day's Night all the way to Dance Tonight with over 30 albums of music inbetween. He has been the source of so much love and joy in my life that I couldn't thank him enough even if I could speak with him. I finally was able to see him upclose and personal a couple of weeks ago and I felt exactly the same way that I felt when I first saw him in person at Shea Stadium in 1966. Yep, I'll always love Paul.








So there are some of the things that I put in my happiness journal. As I read over this list I realize that the name of this blog is very true. Lucky Me!!!!

Thanks For The Memories Timmy!!!

Hi Everybody,

I'm in Gainesville waiting for the pre-game hoopla to start. Kerry is on campus finishing up some lab work and when she is finished she will come home, pick us up and off to the game we will go. I can't wait. The atmosphere here is loony. It's like being at a Paul McCartney concert only more so. There should be 100,000 people at the game and we will be sitting with the students in the 10th row of the end zone. We have bought our Gators tatoos to put on our faces before the game so we should fit right in with the drunken students. LOL

Yesterday Kerry and I got up at 5:30am, put on 4 layers of clothes and waited in 36 degree weather for 3 hours to get the correct tickets for the game. They only had 500 upgraded tickets available and I think if we had been 15 minutes later we would not have made it. Kerry has a student ID but Pat and I had to have a certain sticker on our tickets or we couldn't go. It's just another way to make money but totally worth it. We froze our butts off but it was another wonderful time that we will never forget.

Pat has some kind of foot injury. His ankle is all swollen up and black and blue but he doesn't remember thing that might have happened to cause this. It started at home a day or two before we left and has just gotten worse and worse. I hope he makes it through todays festivities alright.

Rigby did really well in the car but all the activity of Kerry's apartment complex is driving him crazy. Every time a car door slams or he hears people talking he starts barking. He is a Lhasa Apso and that's what his breed is all about. He's an alarm dog which normally is a good thing but not so good at 3:00 in the morning. LOL.

Well, that's it from crazy Gainesville. We will all be at the game early to say goodbye to Tim Tebow. It is his last game at The Swamp and I'm sure there will be lots of crying and upset but excitement too. We will be going home tomorrow and back to work for me on Monday.

Goodbye Timmy. Thanks for 4 fantastic years of exciting, winning football. We will miss you. GO GATORS!!!!!

It's Going To Be A Stressful Day

Stress doesn't even begin to describe what I am going through right now. First off, yesterday was Rigby's first check up with a new vet. He was incredibly well behaved. So much so that even the vet couldn't believe what a good dog he was. When she came in and saw that he was a lhasa apso she said "Oh, Lhasa's are usually not the nicest dogs when it comes to strangers". I laughed and told her a little about my Mac who drove fear into the heart of all vets and strangers but I also told her that Rigby was the exception to the rule and he was. The problem came when she was examining his back leg and she said "you know about his right knee, right?" It turns out that he has a luxating patella which means that his knee joint slips in and out. She said that he may have to have surgery down the line but will definitely have arthritis issues when he gets older. She put him on doggie glucosamine which he will be on for the rest of his life. This upset me to no end. The vet also said that this condition is genetic. So much for going to a good breeder. On the bright side he is the nicest Lhasa Apso in the whole world so that's good. Yeah, I really love him. :)

Rigby and his loving mom

Now, on to Kerry. Oy Vey. Death and trouble(as me and my brother used to say when something went wrong). She took possession of a new apartment yesterday in Gainesville which is riddled with water damage, mold and mildew. Kerry has asthma and cannot live in a place like that. The place was totally gross including a large green painting of a penis on the back of her bedroom wall. I am now going at it with the apartment complex about either switching units or getting out of the lease completely. Of course, before they would give her keys she had to give them a cashier's check for $400 and I may be out that money but I just can't have her living in a place where the walls and floors are wet and mold is growing. I'm trying to remember that as my mom would have told me you get more flies with honey than with vinegar and not flip out on these people. Dealing with apartment rentals is what my last job was all about and I'm trying to use some of that experience in this situation but the complex sounds like they are going to try and take a hard line. Like I said before, death and trouble.

Kerry and her loving mom

I was happy to see the scale go down this morning from 158 back to 155. I had a better eating day yesterday after my private yoga session with Juliana. I'm glad she is back from her vacation. She has a very calming effect on me and I'm hoping that will help me get my eating back under control.

Well, that's it for me. I'm sure you will hear me screaming at the apartment complex manager from wherever you may live. Just ignore it and go on with your lives. :)

Rigby Is My Son

Rigby woke us up at 4:45 this morning scratching at the back door. I dragged myself out of bed and let him out to do his thing in the backyard. He went out and ate grass. I knew this was a bad sign. He laid down in the grass so I picked him up and brought him back inside so I could get some more sleep. Normally he would jump up on the bed and sleep with us but he didn't this morning.

Rigby and me

At 5:30am he started scratching at the door again so Pat got up with him this time. I got dressed so I could go outside and see what was going on. He was just laying in grass breathing heavy. I sat on the grass with him petting him and telling him that everything. He scared me really badly.

We went inside and I gave him some water with ice cubes in it and he seemed to like that. Then I hooked him up and took him out the front for a short walk. Usually he wants to stay outside but he didn't want to this morning. We walked for a short time but he turned around and took me home. I offered him a doggy treat and he took it. It was the first sign that he was going to be alright and believe me, I was happy to see that.

Rigby is such a good boy

After my yoga practice I fixed Rigby his breakfast which he snubbed. Very unusual. I also fixed my breakfast which he normally begs for and he wasn't interested. Hmmm...what to do? I remembered that I had some turkey breast in the fridge and he loves it so I offered him a small piece and he took it. He ended up eating the whole thing. I put some in his food and he ate that too.

He is still not feeling his best but I can tell he is MUCH better than he was before. I remember saying to him "you're only three years old. The universe wouldn't do that to me again so soon. You are not Mac." I'm happy to say that he proved me right. After all, he is my son just like Mac was.

Mac and me

I would like to mention that my good friend Richard Simmons unexpectedly lost his beloved dalmation Dolly yesterday. I remember how it felt when Mac died. I want to let Richard know that I am thinking of him today. He will be on QVC and I'm sure he will be his usual "court jester" on the outside but crying on the inside. I love you, Richard. I'm so sorry about Dolly.

My To Do List

It's getting close. I leave in one week and I am starting to get nervous. It is the usual travel anxiety that I feel once a planned trip gets to be about a week away. I know it's close because Pat mentioned it this morning. He tends to ignore things that he doesn't like until the dying end.

So much to do....so little time.

1. Go bra shopping. This is a must. I can't travel with floppy boobs.

2. Work on my taxes. I want to get it out in the mail to my accountant before I leave.

3. Cook food for Pat. This is something that I do to make life easier for him while I am gone.

4. Go to the podiatrist. I have an appt on the monday before I leave.

5. Go through my closet and see what I have.

6. Wash the things I find in my closet.

7. Take Rigby to the groomer. He's getting long again.

8. Color my hair.

9. Get my eyebrows waxed.

That's my starter list. Now If I can just get at least one or two of these things done every day I'll be ready to go a week from today.

Hang on Fabbies. I a comin.....

I don't know who I am but I'm not myself

I haven't been feeling well lately. Like my mom used to say "I don't know who I am but I am not feeling myself". I'm pretty sure it's got something to do with the new medications that I'm on. At least I hope that is what it is.

I finally called my doctor yesterday and gave him all of my complaints. Very tired, muscle aches, jelly legs, zoning out and generally not feeling right. We are changing up my meds to see if we can figure it all out. We are thinking that the muscle weakness and pains are due to the Zocor and the zoning out and general weirdness is from too much Lisinopril.

Starting today I am cutting the Lisinopril in half and I'm off the Zocor completely. I will continue this for two weeks and then reintroduce the Zocor and see how I feel. Hopefully I will feeling like my old self very soon.

I'm also worried about Rigby. He seems to have developed a bit of a limp. It's his driver side rear. It's more pronounced when he is on the bed. He doesn't seem to be in any pain but I see the leg being held up when he gets up to get off the bed. He is much better on the hard floor but of course, he won't stay there. He's a bed dog. My vet retired so I don't even have a good vet to take him to not to mention the money issues. I don't think I could take it again. Not another sick dog so soon. I'm still not over Mac.

Baby It's Cold Outside

34 degrees? What is that? It's not supposed to get that cold here. I just got in from taking Rigby out and even with 4 layers of clothes on I was freezing. I live in South Florida. I'm not meant to hear numbers like 34. I can't deal. Man, it's cold out there.

I did the deadly deed this morning. I turned on the heat. Being a Floridian means that you NEVER turn on the heat. It's sacrilegious. It's just not done. If Pat was here he would flip out and turn it off. He works for the power company and feels it is never cold enough to use electric heat here in South Florida. I wait for him to leave and then turn it on. Screw that no heat stuff.

Kerry is in Gainesville which is even colder than it is here. They were down in the low 20's this morning so I'm sure my phone will ring very soon. I usually get a whining phone call from her when it is cold out. Yeah, Peewee. Tell me how you are going to move to Chicago or Seattle. Yeah, right.

Rigby is the only one who is happy with the weather and that won't last long either. He has an appointment with the groomer today. He will be cut short as usual and if this keeps up even he will be cold. He loves the cold weather though. Mac did too. I call it Lhasa Apso weather. It's weather that only Lhasa Apsos could love. The cold brings them back to their roots of living in the Tibetan mountains hanging out with the monks.

I gotta go take Rigby now, then it's off to yoga and then off to work if I don't freeze to death first. See ya....

High Blood Pressure

It's still dark as I post this blog entry. It won't be light for another half an hour or so yet and I don't go to the track in the dark. Too scary. Once it gets light out there will be people out there to keep me company.

High blood pressure this morning. 145/90. This is the highest it has been since I started taking my blood pressure meds. I don't know why but my pressure is always highest in the morning. I wake up and roll out of bed with the highest blood pressure of the day. You would think that sleeping wouldn't be stressful enough to raise my pressure but it does. I've been on Lisinopryl for about a month now and when I started taking it it worked really well and my pressure was low even in the morning. Little by little it has been rising but only in the morning. I've noticed that my pressure is high after a night of vivid dreams which I had last night. I dreamed about my dad who has been gone almost 25 years and I never dream about him. I'm not sure what that is all about.

I'm going to call my doctor today and ask him if maybe I should be taking the meds at night instead of first thing in the morning. Maybe that will work better. I'm sure my extra weight is not helping my blood pressure. That's always in the back of my mind too but I can't seem to do anything about it yet. As I posted in on our Fucking Agreement blog my food starts out great with healthy choices in the morning and degenerates into junk food and crap as the day goes on. I also need to exercise one or two more times a week. It's what I need to do for my health so why do I have so much trouble doing it?

Kerry's UT infection is back again and that worries the crap out of me. Bob(our doctor) told her to call him as soon as she feel any kind of symptoms and it started again yesterday. It seems that she is allergic to many of the meds that are prescribed for this so that's a problem along with the fact that she seems to be prone to these infections.I will be speaking to Bob about this too as she is in Gainesville and has classes all day.

Pat and Rigby are fine and that's really good. At least one half of the family has no issues.

Meet The Parents

Kerry's new boyfriend came in from Ft Myers the other day. She had come to me and asked if it was OK if he came for a couple of days so that we could meet him. I was totally up for that as she seems head over heels over this new guy.

Kerry started talking about this grad student named Zac around her birthday. She said "Mom, I met this amazing guy named Zac and we have SO much in common". I, of course, wanted to know what all this "in common" was. Well, it turns out that his mom is Jewish, his dad is Irish, he is a vegetarian, is an animal activist and an environmentalist. To top the whole thing off he loves dogs and even has one up at UF. I said "it sounds like you are looking in the freaking mirror". She got a dreamy look on her face and said "yeah".

Kerry had sent me some pictures of them together partying up in Gainesville so I had somewhat of an idea of how he looked. When he walked in the door I was blown away. The pictures didn't do this kid justice. What a good looking guy. He looks like the Irish side of his family with red hair, blue eyes and fair skin with lots of freckles.

Kerry and Zac

It turns out that he is 25 years old and a PHD student studying cognitive psychology. Not a dummy! He seems sweet, kind and totally into my daughter. He also passed the Rigby test which is all important. The dog loved him.

We all went to El Mariachi for dinner which is a nice Mexican restaurant and had a great time. We had Margaritas which loosened things up a bit. We ate way too much and laughed and laughed. Even Pat was very impressed by this, I was going to say boy but I guess he's a man. It was a just a wonderful time. I think he liked us too.

The happy couple

Now it's Kerry's turn to meet the parents. She is leaving this afternoon to spend a few days in Ft Myers with Zac and his family. I am not worried about this one bit. Kerry does parents very well. They always love her. I'm happy to say that Kerry has inherited my people skills and she puts them to good use. I expect a very upbeat report when she gets back.

I am thrilled to death by this latest development in my daughter's life. She seems so happy and I love the fact that Zac is up at UF with her. He takes care of her and she is the kind of person that sometimes needs that. (I'm thinking that is my fault for hovering over her her whole life.)

This time you won't hear a peep out of me. This is a good thing. Let's hope it lasts.

Foot Solutions

My heel pain has been ruining my life. I haven't been able to exercise, I've been having trouble standing at work and I've been in pain all the time. I've been feeling bad for Rigby because I haven't been able to go for much of a walk lately and he loves a good long walk. I'm like the Michael Phelps commercial where he takes his dog out, looks at his watch and says "go". Even going to the bathroom when I wake up in the middle of the night has been , you'll excuse the expression, a nightmare.

Yesterday I decided to go to Foot Solutions to see what they could do for me. Foot Solutions is a well known place to go when you are having foot issues. Some of my running and yoga friends have told me to go there. I was in so much pain yesterday that I couldn't just sit around and wait for this to go away any longer. If this didn't work I was going to go to the doctor.

I was greeted by Bob who sat me down and started giving me a foot exam. He moved them around, played with my toes and ankles and just generally got off on playing with my feet. Then he took me over to this really cool computer contraption which had a pad that I stood on. The screen showed how my weight was distributed on my feet. He also had me walk back and forth and back and forth and back and forth while he watched me. It was an interesting exam to say the least.

To make a long story short, it seems that I have very flexible feet. As a matter of fact I have the most flexible feet this guy has ever seen and he's been looking at feet for many years. Because I have these flexifeet I need special motion control shoes and inserts. I have been wearing the wrong shoes all these years . He sold me Brooks running shoes and arch support inserts which I must say feels really weird but guess what? I feel better already and it's only been one day. I was able to stand at work last night and not be crippled this morning. I think it's working. Yay!

They also had some REALLY cute black sparkly incredibly comfortable low heels too. Some of you might remember that I love black sparkly shoes so much that I bought a pair on Rodeo Drive a year or so ago. They are not the most comfortable shoes in the world but I do smile whenever I look at them. Once I recover from the cost of the new shoes and inserts I may just find myself back there to buy these other shoes. I love shoes. It's doesn't matter if you gain 10 pounds. They always fit.

Busy And Lazy All At The Same Time

Hi Everybody, :)

Yeah, I'm still here. I really don't have any excuses for not posting other than I have been busy and lazy. Ah...now that's interesting. Busy and lazy all at the same time.

Let's see. Busy. OK. Busy with work. Not only have I been working my regular shifts I have also been filling in when needed as well as going around to local businesses and schools to try to spread the word about Curves. You see, there are some health insurance policies that include full payment to come to our facility. We have lots of teachers and Broward County employees that are coming free of charge and we are trying to stir up some interest at these places. We are also trying to make some new contacts around town. Bra stores, tanning salons, nail salons, day spas and any other place that we think the ladies might hang out. New sign ups can sometimes mean more commissions. Note I said sometimes. No, commissions are not paid for the ladies who sign up with insurance. Only non-insurance people are counted for commission payment however we are always trying to increase our membership. The club must make a profit or I won't have a job. Yeah, I 'm busy keeping my job.

I've also been busy with Kerry. She calls me in between classes so she has someone to talk to while she is walking around campus. She calls me 100 times a day. Well, maybe not 100 but many, many times a day. If you count up all the calls we spend hours on the phone every day. She decided to come home last weekend and we had a really wonderful time together. We went shopping! Surprise, surprise. We spent way too much money on a Diane Von Furstenberg Dress that looked so fantastic on Kerry that I just couldn't say no. There's my problem again. Saying no. I don't do it well especially when it comes to the kid. I really don't mind working for a month to pay for Kerry's new dress. LOL. It's all worth it in the end. It's time spent with my only daughter who means everything to me. So, yeah, I'm busy with Kerry.

I'm busy with yoga. I have increased my yoga practice to classes three times a week along with my own private practice which is done a couple of times a week in my living room. I actually have yoga class today and I need to get going. Yeah, I'm busy with yoga.

I'm busy with Pat. We make sure that we spend time together. With him working every day and me working at least three nights a week it can become really easy to come home, say hi, have dinner and go to sleep. We try to make time to pay attention to each other every day. Now, am I the one doing most of the trying? Oh yeah but I don't mind. He's a guy. I get that. I realize that I do most of the "work" in our relationship but we are still very happy and in love even after almost 40 years together. Did I say 40 years? OMG!! Yeah, I'm busy with Pat.

Rigby keeps me busy too. I'm either pulling things out of his mouth, drying off the drool, combing him, feeding him, taking him out, chasing him around or trying to keep him quiet which is a full time job. He's worth the effort though. He is, after all, my son. :)

Now comes the I'm lazy part. On my off days (and if Kerry isn't home) I spend an amazing amount of time sitting in front of my new big screen TV. The Olympics and the US Open tennis match have kept me glued to my TV. Now the college football season has gotten under way. Go Gators! Go Tim Tebow! I gotta tell you, HD is a wonderful thing especially for sports and for Paul too.

I find it really easy to be lazy. I'm not one of those people who have to be doing something. I love being lazy and doing nothing.

So yeah, busy and lazy. That's me. I gotta go. It's time to get ready for yoga. It keeps me busy.

There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me

Have you ever seen that commercial? It's the one with the golden retreiver puppy singing that song that goes...There ain't no bugs on me, there ain't no bugs on me. There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me. Well, guess what? We found bugs on Rigby and not the usual fleas. We found a tick on him. Kerry found a bump on his skin and started to freak because that's how Mac's Histiocytic Sarcoma started so she decided to play doctor. She grabbed a pair of tweezers and started digging around on him. She found something suspicious and grabbed it with the tweezers. She pulled a tick out of him and it started to crawl up the tweezers. OMG!! Rigby was infected!

How cute is Rigby?

I grabbed him and we ran to see Dr Eich, Rigby's vet. Luckily I had just gotten him groomed the day before so he could be examined with little difficulty. It was time for his yearly shots so we had that done to him along with a stick up the butt for heartworm and Lyme's disease tests. I am happy to report that other than a yeast infection in his ear, all of the tests came out negative and Rigby is as healthy as a little horse. Dr Eich thinks that it was a rouge tick that Rigby probably picked up at the pooping grounds which is what I call the place that we take him for his daily walks. We were given a tick collar that he has to wear for three months but it doesn't seem to bother him too much and all is well in his little doggy world.

There may be bugs on some of you mugs but there ain't no bugs on me!

A Pep Talk....To Myself

OK Claudia, so today is your last day of being 55. I know that you have been pretty upset lately and thinking to yourself that you don't know why. C'mon, you know why. We both know why. It's because tomorrow is your birthday. I think that being upset about your birthday is something that you learned from Ma. She was always upset on her birthday and maybe that's a way of feeling closer to her now that she is gone. Maybe it's time to really look at things instead of just crawling into a hole as you seem to have been doing over the last few weeks.

Being 56 won't that bad. It could be a lot worse. At least you have things in your life to be happy about. You have a rock solid marriage that has been going strong for over 31 years. Pat lives for you (and golf) and after all this time you still look at him as the only one for you (besides Paul). The two of you are still like a couple of high school kids. It feels good to have someone that you can count on no matter what. Yeah, it feels good.

Kerry is doing really well and how proud of her are you? OMG! She is amazing. She is a loving and caring person and so focused on what she wants out of life. She is working so hard to become a doctor. You know that the world is a better place because she is in it. She is a constant source of happiness and joy for you. She is the best and you are a lucky mom. Yeah, being a lucky mom feels good.


Rigby is there right by your feet. He may not be Mac but he is Rigby and he is your doggy love. So what if he is like a needy boyfriend? You look into his eyes and see his soul. It gives you comfort to know that he needs and loves you. He makes you feel all warm and fuzzy. Yeah, that's a good feeling.

You love your new job at Curves. Even though you will not become Donald Trump at this job it is fun and it feels good to help people reach their goals. The clients all love you and they respond to your upbeat personality. They look forward to coming when you are there. Best of all you get paid to workout. Just like Richard. Yeah, that is good.

Your overall health is good and your weight is steady at 145.5. I know you feel as if you have not been doing very well when it comes to eating and exercising but you are not showing any weight gain. You are going to have to make an effort to get a little more exercise on nonworking days. You also need to start cooking at home more than you have been. Your blood pressure has been a little high lately and I am sure it's because of the salt that is always in restaurant food. You need to make more of an effort to eat more healthy food. Remember what Richard told you oh so long ago. "Cut the crap and just do it". Yeah, that felt good.


You are lucky to have your brother Jon to talk to. He makes you feel as if you are still a Long Beach kid. He always brings you back to Lafayette Blvd and when you talk to him it's almost as if Ma and Irv are still alive. I know you miss Ma but she would want you to continue down the path that you are on and she would be very proud of you. She would be very happy that you and Jon are close and that you have each other to rely on. You have to keep on him about his health. You need him to live a long life with you. Yeah, having an older brother is good.

Cousin Stevie is with you too. Well, where else would he be? Stevie has been by your side from the time you were a little kid. Yeah, he drives you crazy sometimes but he is family and he reminds you that family is what is most important. Yeah, family is good.


You always have Michele too. You call her the sister you never had and the brother that you did. From the first time you met her it was as if you knew her your whole life. You two have gone through everything together including losing our Moms and having kids. You are as close as two peas in a pod. Michele is your Ma replacement. When you need advice from Ma you go to Michele and she always says what Ma would have said. How does she do that? There will always be room in the Winabago for Michele. LOL Yeah, having such a close best friend feels good.

You are part of the Fab Four. How lucky are you to have found these three ladies? They all get you and that is SO unusual. They remind you of what you are capable of and that is a gift in itself. You love them all and they love you too. Yeah, being a member of the Fab Four is good.


So life at 56 won't be so bad. After all, as Ma used to say there is only one alternative.

My Two Sons

Rigby is my Lhasa Apso. He is my good son. When Mac died I thought I would never find another dog that I loved as much as him. Mac was my evil son. He was the love of my doggy life but he took his role as the house enforcer a little too seriously. It's hard for me to admit but he was mean. He loved Pat and me but that was really where it ended. Kerry wanted him to love her and I think he did in his own doggy way but more importantly he had to dominate her. He even bit her a couple of times and paid the price. He couldn't help it. It was just the way he was.

When Mac was diagnosed with liver cancer I was devastated. It was one of the hardest things I ever went through. It only took about 6 weeks from the time that he was diagnosed until we finally had to put him down. I was with him to the end. I layed on the table with him when Dr. Eich administered the shot. He died looking into my eyes. I felt his last breath on my face.

I cried constantly for 3 days. I realized that I had to get another dog. Now! I was too lonely and the house was too empty. I didn't want just another dog I wanted another Lhasa Apso. Mac had been such a great dog that I wanted to do it again but with a few small changes. I didn't want the new dog to have to live in Mac's shadow. There were some big shoes to fill around here.

I have a friend who is in the show dog world and she found a breeder of Lhasas that had a litter of puppies that were ready for new homes. Kerry and I took the 2 hour ride to pick out a new dog. I wanted a girl because Mac was a boy. I wanted a golden color dog because Mac was beige/white.

I walked into the breeder's house and was immediately covered in puppies. They were all so cute I couldn't decide. Kerry and I finally picked out this very cute female puppy and decided to take her home. Once all the papers were filled out and the money had been exchanged Kerry and I decided to play with the puppies for a little while longer. We just couldn't leave when there were puppies to be played with.

I sat on the floor indian style while Kerry picked up each puppy to say goodbye. She picked up the golden male and he started to squirm. She dropped him on the floor. I heard the clunk. Ouch!! All of a sudden this male puppy ran over to me and climbed into my lap. He turned around facing out and wouldn't get off. I realized at that moment that I had made the wrong choice. Yes, he was a big male puppy just like Mac but I felt as if he had picked me out. We changed all the paperwork and I took him home. I named him Rigby after Paul McCartney's song Eleanor Rigby.

The older Rigby gets the more he looks like Mac. Pat says he looks like a little ghost. He is, however, sweet and not mean. He doesn't bite or growl like Mac did. You can take him out to meet other dogs and he won't bite them in the face like Mac used to. People can pet him and I don't have to worry about a law suit. You can even take something right out of his mouth and have all 10 fingers when you are done. Mac and Rigby. My two sons. I love them both.

Harmony And Balance In My Living Room

I'm a yoga freak. I love the quiet surroundings and joyfulness that I feel when I finish practicing yoga. This morning I decided to practice in my living room. It's not the same as a private with Juliana at her yoga studio but it's certainly a wonderful thing.

First I lit my Beatles candles. Not only does it give off a beautiful light it allows me to see Paul which is my favorite way to start the day. Then I lit some jasmine incense and turned on a new CD that I bought called "Feng Shui Music For Balanced Living". These things help quiet my mind so that I can focus on my breathing.

After a few minutes of listening and feeling the breath I started my practice of pranayama. This is the practice of controlling the breath. You feel yourself expand with the in breath and release with the out breath. After a few rounds of this you hold the in breath for a few seconds and then add a pause at the end of the out breath. It is really harder than it sounds. It was especially hard when Rigby came over to see what I was doing and started sniffing me and licking my face. That can really mess up someone's mindfulness. Sniff, sniff, sniff, lick, lick, lick.

After the pranayama I started doing the yoga asanas also known as postures. Knees to chest. Sniff, sniff, sniff, Spinal twist. Lick, lick, lick, Fish pose. Sniff, sniff, sniff. Bridge pose. Lick, lick, lick. "Rigby, cut it out"!! "Rigby, go away"!! "RRRiiigggbbbyyy, cut it out!!!

I knew I was in real trouble when it came time in my practice to do downward facing down dog position. In down dog you are in a sort of triangle and in the perfect position to have an upward facing real dog wreck havoc with your yoga practice. See below.




It seemed like the more I pushed him away the more he had to investigate. I realized that there wasn't much I could do to rescue my practice from the whim of my Lhasa Apso . I decided to give him a treat. I did a head stand against the wall. Oh, wow!! That was really cool. Rigby was completely enthralled. He came over to sniff and lick as I was standing with my hands underneath my head and unable to push him away. I laughed and laughed. I think he did too in his own doggie way. I think next time I decide to practice yoga in my living room I'll let my "Sweetpea" out in the back yard.