Thank you, Ang

I had a good food and exercise day yesterday. Committing to Ang's summer challenge has really made a difference in my eating habits over the last couple of days. I am eating real healthy meals instead of just grazing all day and I even did a hard toning session yesterday that I am feeling today. I guess that's a good thing. I am planning to do some yoga a little later today. Maybe it will help my mental status which sucks.

I just finished up my healthy breakfast which was an egg cooked with Pam, a piece of whole wheat toast topped with some ICBINBL and a very tasty orange. For me, this is a definite improvment over what I was eating. Now, if I can just keep it up....

Exercise is hard to do. My foot pain is still there and not being helped by having to stand up at Curves. The doctor visit didn't really help much and I'm feeling very down about all of this. Yeah, I know, exercise in a chair. Yeah, I know. The reality is it's not going to happen. If I'm going to exercise I have to enjoy what I do. I loved going to the track and walking but I can't do that now. I loved doing Richard's tapes but I can do that now. Exercising in a chair? I am not feeling the love there. I'll just do the best I can.

Each decision, whether it be about food or exercise, is made taking Ang's challenge in mind. Once again, thanks to Ang for going to all of that trouble and keeping me in line...somewhat.

Never Give Up

Well, it's started. Kerry left on Monday afternoon and I haven't stopped eating since. It's actually amazing the amount of food that I can consume without really thinking about it. I let the loneliness I felt for my daughter overwhelm me and started eating. And it's the worst kind of eating. Emotional. What gets me is that I am aware of it. I know I'm doing it but don't or can't stop. What's up with that? Huh?

Breakfast is good. It's always good. I always have either a half of a bagel with one tablespoon of whipped cream cheese and an orange or a bowl of oatmeal with berries. Sometimes I even go all the way and make myself a mixture of Egg Beaters with onion, mushrooms and any other kind of veggie and a piece of toast. All of these are pretty good choices for a healthy breakfast. I do indulge in too much coffee in the morning but as for as food goes I think my breakfast choices are pretty good. After that I am screwed.

I don't really eat lunch. I start my grazing and it doesn't stop until I start getting ready for work. Now I have to ask myself is it grazing or binging? Does it really matter? All I know is that I don't really eat a real lunch. I just go for whatever is around. Fruit, cheese, almonds, lots of bread and rolls. Sometimes, every now and then, I'll have some soup or leftovers from the night before but I never stop there. I just keep going, eating until I get ready for work which is usually about 2:30. I've tried to change this but I keep going back to my bad habits.

Now looking at this a little closer it seems that I have food difficulties from lunch time to dinner time. OK, now that's about 4 hours or so. Maybe I need to find something to do during this time of day so that my head doesn't end up in the fridge looking for something that isn't even there. I wish I was more like my unbelievably talented and crafty friend Laura who makes beautiful jewelry. I've tried knitting, crocheting, painting by numbers and many other things. I'm just not very crafty so I always struggle and finally lose interest. I guess I need to find something interesting I can do during the time when I usually end up looking for food. I need to change things up. Not something that comes easily to me, change. I will try though. It's all about trying. Right? Like Richard always says "Never give up".

High Blood Pressure

It's still dark as I post this blog entry. It won't be light for another half an hour or so yet and I don't go to the track in the dark. Too scary. Once it gets light out there will be people out there to keep me company.

High blood pressure this morning. 145/90. This is the highest it has been since I started taking my blood pressure meds. I don't know why but my pressure is always highest in the morning. I wake up and roll out of bed with the highest blood pressure of the day. You would think that sleeping wouldn't be stressful enough to raise my pressure but it does. I've been on Lisinopryl for about a month now and when I started taking it it worked really well and my pressure was low even in the morning. Little by little it has been rising but only in the morning. I've noticed that my pressure is high after a night of vivid dreams which I had last night. I dreamed about my dad who has been gone almost 25 years and I never dream about him. I'm not sure what that is all about.

I'm going to call my doctor today and ask him if maybe I should be taking the meds at night instead of first thing in the morning. Maybe that will work better. I'm sure my extra weight is not helping my blood pressure. That's always in the back of my mind too but I can't seem to do anything about it yet. As I posted in on our Fucking Agreement blog my food starts out great with healthy choices in the morning and degenerates into junk food and crap as the day goes on. I also need to exercise one or two more times a week. It's what I need to do for my health so why do I have so much trouble doing it?

Kerry's UT infection is back again and that worries the crap out of me. Bob(our doctor) told her to call him as soon as she feel any kind of symptoms and it started again yesterday. It seems that she is allergic to many of the meds that are prescribed for this so that's a problem along with the fact that she seems to be prone to these infections.I will be speaking to Bob about this too as she is in Gainesville and has classes all day.

Pat and Rigby are fine and that's really good. At least one half of the family has no issues.

Wednesday Is The First Day Of The Rest Of My Life

Today's exercise will be an hour and a half yoga class and I'm happy about that. Wednesday's class is a ramped up hatha yoga practice. It includes vinyasa flow, more standing postures and sun salutations. It kicks my butt. I need to remember to bring a towel. I know Richard doesn't consider yoga exercise but he has never taken Juliana's Wednesday class. It would kick even his well toned butt.

Here is Juliana on the beach. Hey Richard, let's see you do this!!

Here I am in Downward Facing Dog

This is Pidgeon pose

I know you' ve seen this one before but it is one of my favs. Richard and me in love!!

I have promised Laura that I will behave myself during the holidays where food is concerned. In keeping my promise to my fellow fabbie this morning's breakfast was an egg white scramble with onions and red peppers. It reminded me of the fab breakfasts I get when I am on vacation and staying at the Hotel California aka Chez Laura. The food is outstanding and there is lots of it but I still manage to lose a couple of pounds when I go. So hey, hey, I'm on my way. OK Everyone sing along.....

Easy Come, Easy Go

Thanksgiving was great. Kerry was home and Cousin Stevie came over for dinner. He and Pat played golf in the afternoon while Kerry and I did the cooking. The kid has turned into this amazing cook! She made a spinach and cheese quiche that was just fantastic. I'm sure the calorie count was way up there but I ate it anyway. After all, the kid made it!! It was a nice low keyed dinner which worked for me because I did most or all of the work. We didn't get to eat the birthday cake. Everyone was too full from dinner. I guess that's a good thing.

Black Friday was soooo much fun. Kerry woke me up at 6:00AM and we were at the Town Center Mall by 8:00. We totally shopped our brains out getting some really great deals at Bloomingdales, Lucky Jeans, Clarks Shoes, Anthropologie and Coach. Most of the stuff was for Kerry with one or two things for me. Anyone who knows me knows which store was the one that I bought myself something at. Yeah, I spent most of the money that I won at the casino but what the hell. Easy come, easy go.

My heel is still giving me some trouble but I think it's getting better slowly. I was able to workout to a video yesterday so that was good. Today I think I will stick to some weight training. It will be much easier on my heel and I also have to work tonight which puts me up on my feet for hours.

Food could have been better but on the other hand it could have been a lot worse too. I was down to 152 yesterday which shocked the crap out of me. I figured I was totally out of the 150's and into the 160's but I'm happy to say not even close. Now if I could just get rid of the extra few pounds as easily as I was able to get rid of my winnings I'd be happy. C'mon extra weight!!! Easy come, easy go.

Monday, Monday

It's Monday today. Back to work and back on track. I am down 5 of the 15 pounds that I had gained and I'm feeling good. I've been good with food and consistent with exercise. I went to the track this weekend as well and a Friday yoga class and a Saturday yoga workshop.

Making healthy food choices will be my challenge today as I have already been to the track and powerwalked 4 hot and sweaty miles. I will be moving tonight at Curves. It's all about the food today. It's all about the food every day. Oh yeah.

I would like to take this opportunity to thank my blogging friends, Laura, Beth, Vennie and Ang. Your blogs give me motivation, make me laugh, and let me know that I am not alone.

Happy Birthday to you yesterday Bethy. I hope you had a great day. Laura, Vennie and Ang I love you all.