Happy New Year-I can't believe that I have been blogging for a whole year

Happy New Year to everyone.

I logged into my weight tracker in the clubhouse this morning. I knew as I was doing it that it wasn't going to be pretty but I decided to do it anyway. You see, the last time I posted my weight into my profile on Richard's website was January 1, 2008. I knew I had lost focus regarding my weight and I guess there was also an element of living in the dream world that you didn't gain much weight this year. Well, not! I am totally upset, embarrassed, humiliated, horrified and sickened to say that I gained 7.5 this year. Not only that but over the last two years I have allowed 12.5 to creep back onto my body and once again have weight to lose on New Years Day.

The only good thing that I can think of is that at least I faced the dreaded numbers on the scale. The credit for my facing my numbers goes to my friend who in a email made me realize that I really didn't know where I stood with my weight. Exactly. I knew my boobs were growing bigger and bigger every day. I knew that I was bringing food into the house that was destined to end up on my growing silhouette but I didn't know what the numbers were going to say. It was hard to look at it. For me this is a troublesome eventuality. I can't help but wonder what this says about my life and my mental state.

Yes, I could give a litany of excuses for why I gained weight. I could blame it on the plantar fasciitis that has stopped me from exercising and that would true. I could blame it on the fact that I work until 8:00PM and by the time I get home to make dinner I end up eating and then going to bed which is perfect way to pack on the pounds and that would be true too. Whatever and whoever is to blame I need to get over it and start back on a healthy lifestyle.

I guess I have to remember that my weight is within my control. I am very happy to say that I went to the track this morning and power walked 3 miles. When it was over I stretched out my foot and it's actually feeling pretty good. I'm hoping that my foot is beginning to heal and maybe I can get back to consistent exercise. Not only will that help my weight it will also help my self image and self esteem which has been in the toilet lately.

I have promised myself that I would make no grand proclamations on New Years and call them resolutions. In reviewing those proclamations from years past I realize that I don't usually attain them and that makes me feel like crap but I also know that goals need to be set so that a person has something to work towards. So here I go....

I want to get this extra weight off of me. My first "mini goal" will be to get back into the 140's. I know that it is going to take hard work and perseverance. I know that it would be easy to just give up but I can't. I just can't. I am going to live a healthier lifestyle this coming year. I am going to eat better foods and not quite as often. I am going to start regular exercise again and hope that my body responds well. I am going to do the very best that I can to get that old mindset back and lose this weight. You know "I can do it."

I also am going for a non weight related goal this year. I'm not really ready to write it down for all the world to see but I privately know what it is. I am going to work hard to achieve it.

I hope y'all enjoyed my blog this past year. I found it very interesting to go back and see what was going on in my head and my life last year. I hope this year you will be reading a fun and happy blog.

I want to wish all of you a happy and healthy new year.